#and he keeps being like ��because it’s 6:20 this is true’ and like ‘i know that at 9 pm everyone is gonna understand’

[solace-seekers]

screaming into the void <3

[snowysosturn]

Fire & Desire - Matt Sturniolo Part 27

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Finale

Pairing: Y/n x Matt Sturniolo

Summary: Y/n has always clashed with Matt. Despite working for Chris’s clothing brand and being close with Nick, her relationship with Matt has always been tense at best. While being forced to be around each other more, their animosity turns into something deeper. Can they overcome their differences, or will their fiery emotions tear them apart?

Warnings: Angst, tension, mention of loss of appetite

After Chris drops me off, I make my way back up to my hotel room, kicking off my shoes the second I step inside. I don’t bother turning on the lights. Instead, I walk straight to the bed, sinking into the mattress with a deep sigh. I stare up at the ceiling, letting everything replay in my head - Hawaii, the beach, the club, Matt, Christina, the way everything crumbled so fast I barely had time to process it.

I’m relieved things are okay between me and Chris. At least that part of my life isn’t in ruins. But the conversation we had keeps looping in my mind. The way he said it so casually, like it wasn’t even a question.

"Matt slept on the couch when she stayed in the room. I may have been drunk, but I remember that well."

She lied.

Christina lied about sleeping with Matt in Vegas.

I sit up, rubbing my temples, trying to make sense of it. 

Why would she say that? What did she gain from making me believe something that never happened? Was it to hurt me? To plant something in my head? Did she just want Matt to herself?

But then, I shake my head because none of it even matters. True or not, it doesn’t erase everything else that happened. It doesn’t erase the fact that Matt still brought her home that night.

I rake my brain over and over again, replaying every little detail, every moment where I should have seen it coming, should have stopped it before it spiraled. None of it changes anything, though. It all still happened.

With a sigh, I pull out my phone, my thumb hovering over the message Matt sent me. The one I never responded to. I debate back and forth, my fingers twitching like they want to type something, anything, but I know nothing good will come from it. 

What could I even say?

That I miss him? 

That I hate him? 

That I don’t know how to feel anymore?

Instead, I lock my phone, but as if on cue, my stomach grumbles, pulling me out of my thoughts. I hadn't even realized how long it’s been since I last ate. Between everything happening, I’ve barely had an appetite. But now, hunger is getting to me, and I know I need to eat something.

I unlock my phone and open the Uber Eats app. Comfort food is a must right now. So I quickly decide on Raising Cane’s. Some chicken tenders, crinkle cut fries, and Cane’s sauce are more than justified right now.

I place my order and set my phone down, letting out a deep sigh as I sink further into the bed. I roll onto my side, pulling the blankets over me, wanting the minutes to pass faster. My order should be here soon, and maybe after I eat I can just easily fall asleep.

As I lay there, my stomach growls again, reminding me to check where the driver is. I glance at my phone, refreshing the Uber Eats tracking page, watching as the little car icon inches closer to my location.

Two minutes away. 

I let out a breath and push myself off the bed, grabbing my key card and slipping on my shoes before heading downstairs.

The hotel lobby is empty for the most part, the odd one or two people checking in this late in the evening. I step outside into the cool night air, the slight chill giving me goosebumps. 

A black car pulls up to the curb, and I recognize the make and model from the tracking page. I approach as the driver steps out of his car, I greet him with a polite smile before taking the bag from his hands.

"Thanks, have a good night" I say, my voice soft.

"You too!" he replies before driving off.

I shift the bag in my hands, inhaling the familiar, comforting scent of Raising Cane’s. Just as I turn to walk back toward the hotel entrance, I hear something.

A voice.

Calling my name.

Loud. Urgent. Familiar.

"Y/N!"

My body tenses, my breath catching in my throat. The way my name is said, the sharpness in the tone, makes my heart pound in my chest. My fingers tighten around the bag. I don’t turn immediately. A part of me doesn’t want to. A part of me knows exactly who it is.

Slowly, I turn around, and there he is.

Matt.

Standing a few feet away, looking right at me, like he can’t believe I’m real. His chest rises and falls with quick, uneven breaths. His hair is messier than usual, his hoodie slightly wrinkled like he threw it on in a hurry. But it’s his eyes that get me. They’re heavy, filled with something unreadable, something I’m not sure I want to unpack right now.

Suddenly, I’m not hungry anymore.

"Y/n.." His voice is softer this time, hesitant, like he doesn’t know if he has the right to speak to me. Like he’s waiting for permission.

I should walk away. I should ignore him, turn around, and disappear into the hotel. But I don’t. Because even after everything, even after the lies, the betrayal, the absolute mess that’s been left in the wake of it all, there’s a part of me that wants answers.

Matt takes a cautious step forward, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his hoodie like he’s trying to hold himself together. His jaw tenses, like he’s bracing for me to turn and leave, but I don’t.

Not yet.

"I’ve been trying to talk to you.." he says, voice low, almost pleading. "You haven’t answered me."

I exhale slowly, gripping the bag in my hand a little tighter. "I know."

He nods, like he expected that answer, like he’s already had this conversation in his head a hundred times. "Can we just..can we talk? Please?"

Everything in me screams that this is a bad idea, that nothing he says will change what happened. But I also know that if I don’t hear him out now, he’s just going to keep showing up, keep pushing until I finally break. And maybe, I need to hear what he has to say.

I glance toward the hotel entrance, debating.

"Fine.." I say, my voice barely above a whisper. "Come up."

The walk through the lobby is silent. I feel Matt’s presence beside me, but I don’t look at him. Not even when we step into the elevator. The doors slide shut, trapping us in the small space together, you could cut the tension with a knife.

The elevator dings, and we step out. I swipe my keycard and push open the door, stepping inside. Matt follows hesitantly, his eyes scanning the room.

He lets out a low breath, taking it all in. "Damn" he says, nodding to himself. "Chris made sure you’re taken care of."

I freeze mid step, my stomach twisting. I slowly turn to face him, my brows furrowed.

How did he know that?

"How did you know it was Chris?"

Matt looks at me, realizing what he just said. "The GPS.." he says simply, like it’s obvious. "I went to go for a drive and when I got in the car, the last route was set here. I put two and two together."

I exhale sharply, shaking my head. "So you just assumed?"

Matt tilts his head slightly. "Am I wrong?"

I don’t answer. Because no, he’s not wrong. Chris’s little mistake led Matt right to me.

Matt sighs, stepping further into the room. "Look, I didn’t come here to start something. I just.. I need you to hear me out."

I swallow hard, leaving the food down on the bed side table. "Then talk."

Matt swallows hard, running a hand through his hair. "I fucked up" he starts, shaking his head. "I know that. I know I hurt you, and I swear to God, Y/n, that was never what I wanted."

I scoff, shifting my weight. "You sure? Because it felt pretty fucking intentional."

His expression twists, like the words physically hurt. "It wasn’t. I-" He exhales, frustrated, like he doesn’t even know where to begin. "When you and Nate got up and went to the bar, I pulled Chris aside" He says, rubbing a hand down his face like he’s replaying it all in his head. "I asked him what the fuck he was thinking, why he would bring them out. But then I saw you leave with Nate, and I didn’t know if you were just stepping out for air or if you were gone for the night."

I stay quiet, waiting.

"So we went back to the table" he continues, "and after a while, Chris and Rachel decided to leave. I figured I’d get out of there too, but Nick was nowhere to be found, and Christina was.." He pauses, shaking his head. "She was a mess. Completely fucked up. She could barely stand, and when I told her it was time to go, she couldn’t even remember where she was staying."

I clench my jaw, a bitter taste in my mouth. I feel like I can already see where this is going, and I don’t like it.

"She got sick on the sidewalk and everything Y/n" Matt adds, sighing. "I had no other option but to bring her back to the villa. I couldn’t just leave her there."

I exhale sharply through my nose, looking away.

"I let her use my bed" he says, holding my gaze, his voice steady. "And I slept on the couch. Told her as soon as Rachel was awake, she could go."

Silence stretches between us, the only thing I can hear is my heartbeat in my ears. He’s saying all the right things, but it doesn’t erase the image burned into my mind, the sight of Christina in his bed the next morning.

“Do you have any idea what that morning did to me?” I whisper, my eyes to meeting his. “What it felt like to see her there?”

Matt’s expression shatters. “I do.” he admits. “And I hate myself for it. But I didn’t sleep with her" he says, softer now. "Nothing happened, Y/n. I swear to you."

I swallow hard, searching his face for any sign of a lie. But all I see is sincerity, frustration, exhaustion.

I press my lips together. I want to believe him. Maybe I even do. But it doesn’t erase the hurt, the betrayal I felt that morning, the way my heart shattered at the sight of them together.

Matt steps closer, his voice softer now, almost pleading. “Y/n.. please. Say something.”

I shake my head, letting out a bitter laugh. “What do you want me to say, Matt? That it’s fine? That none of it matters?” My voice rises, and I hate the way it cracks. “Because it does. It does matter.”

His jaw tightens. “I know it does. That’s why I’m here.”

I scoff, turning away from him, running a hand through my hair. “It’s too late for that.”

“No, it’s not.” He moves closer, hesitating before reaching for my arm. His touch is warm, familiar, almost comforting, and it makes my chest ache. “I know I fucked up, Y/n. I should’ve told you the second you walked in that morning. I should’ve-” He stops himself, exhaling sharply. “I should’ve fought harder for you.”

I pull away, my back hitting the edge of the bed as I shake my head. “You didn’t even try.”

Matt’s eyes darken with frustration. “That’s not true.”

“It isn’t?” I snap. “Because from where I was standing, you just stood there while I walked away.”

Matt shakes his head. “The second I found out you left, I booked the next flight home. I didn’t even think twice, Y/n. I just-” He stops, shaking his head. “I needed to find you.”

My heart stammers in my chest, but I don’t let it show. “You did?”

Matt lets out a bitter laugh, his eyes dark with frustration. “Yeah, I hoped I’d be able to speak to you when I got home, hoping that's where you'd be. I saw the yellow jumper on my bed. And for a second, I thought you were there. That you were home.” His voice cracks slightly, and he swallows hard. “I ran upstairs to talk to you, but then.. I saw that all of your things were gone.”

My breath catches in my throat.

“I freaked out” he admits, his gaze locking onto mine. “I tore through the whole place looking for something, anything, that told me where you went. I asked Nick. I asked Chris. Shit, even until today, I was still asking. But no one would tell me a thing.” His hands clench at his sides. “Do you know how that felt? Knowing you were gone but having no idea where? No way to find you?”

I don’t answer. I can’t. Because for the first time, I realise that while I was drowning in my own pain, Matt had been spiraling too.

He takes a step closer, his voice lower now, rough with emotion. “Y/n, I know I hurt you. And I know you probably hate me for it. But don’t ever think for a second that I didn’t care. That I wasn’t trying to fix this.”

Matt steps even closer, his voice barely above a whisper now. “I told you before, I wasn’t sure where I fit into your life.” He hesitates for a second, searching my face. “But I always knew where I wanted to.”

I feel my heart in my throat as he continues.

“I wanted to fit in it as your boyfriend, Y/n.” His voice is hoarse, almost pleading.

I stare at him, my breath catching. I don’t know what to say. I don’t even know what to feel.

I wanted this. God, I wanted this so badly before. But now? After everything?

“You’re telling me this now?” My voice cracks. “Now, after I had to leave? After I had to put myself back together on my own?”

Matt’s jaw clenches. “I never wanted you to leave. No one would ever let me get a word in when I tried to explain myself.”

I close my eyes for a brief second, just enough to stop the tears from threatening to fall. I know he’s right. I should say something. I should tell him I need time, or that I can’t do this, or that it’s too late.

"I love you, Y/n."

The words land like a punch to the gut. My heart stutters, my stomach tightens, and for a second, I forget how to breathe.

Matt takes a step closer, his voice softer now, but no less certain. "I’ve always loved you. Even when I was too stupid to show it the right way. Even when I was making all the wrong choices. But from the minute we made it known we had feelings for eachother, I would never ever do anything to jeopardise that. I love you, and I don’t think that’s ever gonna change."

I stare at him, my mind spinning, my throat tight.

I open my mouth, but nothing comes out.

Matt studies my face, searching for something, anything. But when I still don’t speak, he just nods to himself, lips pressing into a tight line.

"I should go" he says quietly, stepping back like he’s giving me space, heading toward the door and gripping the handle. But I could see it in his eyes, he’s terrified this is the moment he loses me for good.

And maybe it is.

Or maybe.. it isn’t.

I don’t know.

And that’s the scariest part.

a/n : 3 parts left..

taglist : @mattybearnard @sturn-33 @ncm9696 @yourfavsturniologirl @crazy4jewel @sodakid1234 @stupendoustreewinner @lovealwayssturniolos @matthewsturniolosss @m4ttsmunch @loveexxx @ilusa @starkeyszn @wonnieeluvvr @dylnblue @valxrieq @maggot3647 @cigarettecemetary @ribread03 @chrisstvrns @bandasaruswrx @noplaceissafeanymore @amexiass @witchofthehour @mattssgf @jetaimevous @v33angel  @ivysturnss @urmom69lol @ashlishes @watercolorskyy @sturnioloshottiekay @amelia-sturniolo3 @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @pvssychicken @alizestvrnss @chrisstxrnsaxe @sophand4n4 @vickytaa @marrykisskilled @bxtchboy69 @yourfavsturniologirl @julisturn @sydneyylainn @sophia-77n @trevorsgodmother @sturnslutz @yourmother29 @girl24cherry @astronea @pinkdyit

[honeyspeeches]

I’ve been thinking about something and wanted your take—

In the fandom, there’s this ongoing hate towards Lance where people really criticise or even villainise him for flirting too much. But on rewatch, I actually noticed… he doesn’t flirt nearly as much as people make it out to be?

Curious what your thoughts are. Do you think that reputation is deserved?

Well… first of all, what’s so wrong with flirting ?? It’s not like he’s touching anyone inappropriately… the only reason Shiro keeps telling him off for flirting is because he's being unserious in a serious situation. But it’s not like he’s harming anyone…

Okay, well, to determine that, let’s have a look at the times Lance actually does flirt.

Is Lance’s flirting excessive and inappropriate?

Would you believe me if I said that the first time he flirts its actually not with Allura??? let me show you first when he flirts with Allura:

[26:19]

He has a very consistent flirting face:

ummm but... haven't we seen this face before???

[Season 1, Episode 1: The Rise of Voltron, 23:20]

huh. anyway!

When he catches Allura in his arms, he did so before he got a good look at her and found her attractive. So, it's not like he purposefully caught her in his arms 'cause he wanted to flirt with her.

[26:13]

Next time he flirts, it's again with Allura and we start to see a pattern of Shiro telling Lance off for flirting in serious situations:

I mean, Sendak just sent them a threat lmao this isn't the time to be flirting my guy.

I'm saying Shiro only does this in serious situations because when Lance wakes up in Episode 6 and flirts with Allura again, Shiro is smiling:

[Season 1, Episode 6: Taking Flight, 02:18]

The way we as the viewers would think about Lance is very much informed by the ways other characters react to him. I think most people find his flirting inappropriate because of the way especially Shiro and Allura react to him, the two most mature characters in the first two seasons. Shiro keeps telling him to stop (in serious situations) and Allura is not receptive to his advances.

[Season 1, Episode 6: Taking Flight, 02:16 ; Season 2, Episode 3: Shiro's Escape, 12:45]

So, Lance flirts with Allura a lot, and she's not receptive of it. But... she's also the only one not receptive of it.

[Season 1, Episode 6: Taking Flight, 09:40 ; Season 2, Episode 2: The Depths, 06:23 ; Season 2, Episode 7: Space Mall, 11:57 ; Season 4, Episode 4: The Voltron Show, 12:51]

So, Lance's flirting is situationally inappropriate, but otherwise harmless. And the only one who isn't receptive of his flirting is Allura, so it's not violating anyone in any way.

Lance also mostly flirts in the first two seasons, but it's not all the time. The last time he flirts, as in actual flirting as we see it above is in Season 2, Episode 7: Space Mall. In Season 2 Episode 11, Lance does have his bravado face on when he says "the sharpshooter is on the way", but considering he has just confessed his insecurities to the yupper, I think it's more Lance making up for his insecurities and the vulnerability he feels, rather than actual flirting.

And wouldn't you know it, Lance doesn't flirt with anyone at all in season 3. In Season 4, Episode 4: The Voltron Show, Lance is dubbed Loverboy Lance to which he says it's true even though we haven't seen him act like a loverboy at all since season 2. And although he's dubbed as Loverboy Lance, none of the shows actually include him flirting with anyone, he's mainly just kinda objectifying himself to the audience:

and the one time he does flirt, it's with the Red Lion...

[Season 4, Episode 4: The Voltron Show, 16:00]

which uh... okay. Anyway!

He doesn't flirt a single time in any of the rest of the seasons, either. Not even with Romelle:

[Season 7, Episode 2: The Road Home, 05:29]

He's not wearing his flirting face at all. In fact, he finds her super annoying.

So Lance hasn't flirted with anyone (except the Red Lion...) since season 2. Season 3, we saw him grow a lot, and he becomes a much more serious character from then on. To paint Lance as an overexcessive flirt is to frankly ignore canon and all the growth he's shown across the show.

[arciam]

Underrated JayVik moments/lines (8/∞)

"I've come with Viktor; my partner and a Zaunite."

Finally the hypeman Viktor deserved.

Jokes aside, this line is one of the reasons I started making this series in the first place. Specifically the "Zaunite" part of it.

Why? Because not only has Jayce up until this point always referred to just "people from the Undercity"... I feel like he never even fully acknowledged that Viktor was one of them, either.

Or rather: that Zaun was still a part of Viktor.

Sure, Viktor essentially introduces himself to Jayce as a "cripple from the Undercity" and often enough states his wish to help the people there, but I believe this likely struck Jayce as gracious - same as it was for him - rather than personal.

After all, Viktor had successfully escaped the Undercity, right? He more than deserved his place in Piltover, right?

Jayce never thought less of Viktor for being a Zaunite, but that doesn't mean he respected his heritage. (The biggest indication of which, of course, being their infamous argument on the bridge. When Jayce says "They're dangerous!" he absolutely means it as a them, not a you.)

Yet here, he finally acknowledges and demonstrates respect for Viktor's heritage as a fully integral part of who he is - a boon, even, rather than a misfortune - and gives him the floor for this crucial moment of the proposal.

Speaking of: it's a pivotal gesture not only in terms of Jayce recognising Viktor as a Zaunite. I want to draw attention to this moment in episode 4 real quick:

(I LOVE how this is a perfect mirror image to the scene above.)

Here, Jayce is keeping Viktor from speaking even one word in front of the council. To protect him, to take full responsibility, to do the right thing... to do everything except take into consideration what Viktor might have even wanted to say.

He means well, of course he does - but it will take him until the season finale to realise that what marginalised people need is not for someone to protect them or govern them or speak for them.

It's for their voice to be heard.

In conclusion: not only is the scene as a whole the perfect culmination of Jayce's character arc in season 1, but this line in particular proves how it would have also served as the perfect starting point for a mended - and while more jaded, way stronger - JayVik bond if things hadn't gone south again immediately.

I know Viktor will later say "our paths diverged long ago", but even though that is true looking back from that particular moment in time, I've always loved how in reality, they did, just for one day, fully find their way back to each other in this season finale.

Part 1/2/3/4/5/6/7/7½/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20

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[jthealien]

Foreshadowing I’ve Found for THAT Reveal

Spoilers for the Season 1 finale under the cut!!!

HI GUYS HOW ARE WE FEELING WOW

I’ve spent the weeks in between the fast pass release and now rereading and looking for every bit of foreshadowing I could find for B- I mean Nox… being a key. (Or at least key adjacent)

Side Note: I’m playing fast and loose with the definition of foreshadowing here. Some are pretty small details or silly observations, but my list my rules :P

So here it is compiled in a massive (vaguely chronological) list with numbered photos!

Also if there’s anything I missed (I’m sure there is) please add it!!

———

1) The literal first scene of the comic is a crescent moon (in a purple background), which we now know is Nox/the villain key’s symbol

2) (Ep. 13) Nox knows “plenty about the keys.” uh yeah I bet you would

3) (Ep. 13) Chase asks if Nox is part of Ex Libris and wants to make the keys more miserable, which seems to make him really upset. It’s understandable, I’d be pretty upset if I was implied to be working with my tormentors to make my own life even worse.

4) (Ep. 13) From the start Nox assumes Chase wants the keys for something selfish. Considering Ex Libris treats the keys like objects, and some of the keys (like Bronze) are pretty weary around people, that’s not an unreasonable assumption. Nox is so accustomed to being used by higher ups for selfish wishes

—This puts his outburst in Ep. 31 in a whole new light, specifically the line about Chase wanting to befriend the keys. He’s so convinced that couldn’t be true because it’s never been true for him.

5) Each of the keys has a specific junk food/snack they like. Silver has cheese, Bronze has peanut butter, Goldie has gummies, and it seems Nox has chocolate :]

6) (Ep. 20) “Every last thing” about the keys is his business in his words

—Guess that includes himself

7) Metals can rust, and Nox isn’t a fan of water (besides baths, but I assume that’s because he can control when he goes in and for how long)

8) When you stick a key in a book, they automatically know the story (as said by Bronze in Ep. 21). This explains why Nox seems to know a book’s plot no matter what

9) (Ep. 28) He says that the keys can take advantage of “certain loopholes.” In that moment, this is a reference to what characters a key can use for their role. But it could also be a nod to how keys can technically use other keys to enter stories. He’d know that since it’s what he’s been doing this whole time.

10) In the infamous “They feed you, right?” scene (Ep. 29), we’ve always kind of assumed that — yeah — Ex Libris just doesn’t feed him often. But in this scene, Chase ALSO says “keep you locked up.” I have a feeling that’s actually what Buddy got upset about. Ex Libris probably did keep him locked up as a key, which has to be really traumatic considering his severe claustrophobia.

11) (Ep. 31) Nox assumes Chase’s wish is just as “self-serving” as his is, which we now know is to be human again.

—(Nox actually projects a lot of his own feelings onto Chase, I’ll talk about that some other time though.)

—Referring back to number 5, during this whole confrontation, Nox is convinced that Chase only wants Narratonin for a wish. As a key, of course he’d think that, because that’s all that the humans usually around him want.

12) ”Nobody should have to accept being the villain if they’re trying their best not to be.” (Ep. 30) and “I get it, you’re the villain around here…” (Ep. 32)

—He literally IS the villain

—(Also I didn’t have room to include it, but Nox gets a really sad look on his face after Chase says that last line. yikes..)

13) (Ep. 32) In response to Chase talking about trusting humans, Nox says “them.” He could’ve said something like ‘people’ or ‘anyone,’ but his wording here implies that he sees human beings as separate from himself.

14) The crescent moon necklace on his outfit in Sick Days, as well as the half-ones on his jacket. If you really think about it you could also count the gemstones near his eyes as representing his gem eyes.

—It’s maybe a little strange that this outfit is the one he decided to make so similar to his key form. But it makes sense considering the previous arc was Beach Boys, where Nox became more trusting of Chase

15) (Ep. 35) He’s never been sick because keys can’t get sick.

16) (Ep. 36) He says “real people” and “person,“ showing again how he might not think of himself as either of those. (See number 13)

17) (Ep. 39) There’s a lock on Nox’s coffin

18) (Ep. 39) I originally thought it was the lighting but nope, his ear is literally gray! Also his hair here is less spiky at the ends, like how it is in his key form

19) (Ep. 39) He looks surprised by his reflection, because he’s only used to seeing his human form while in the books.

—In fact, since you can’t see yourself in the book mirrors, when’s the last time he saw himself as a human?

20) (Ep. 39) The broken key-ring looking thing around his neck

21) (Ep. 49) “Good, that means I’m taller than someone for once.” if only you knew, Chase..

22) The entirety of Ep. 50 confirming that keys can go into books

23) (Ep. 53) He gets really pissy over the idea of his teeth being “baby”. Might be carry over from his grudge against being like 5 inches tall in reality

24) (Ep. 53) His claustrophobia could stem from being stuck in his key form and being put in a box for weeks or months at a time.

—He keeps repeating that he just needs to “wait it out” and “it’s fine” because that’s all he could do and think as a key

25) (Ep. 54) “That moon is too close” following the scene where Buddy decides to lower his guard and work on his harmful behaviors. We now know the symbol of the villain key is the moon, so it could be Nox trying to distance himself from his role as the villain.

26) (Ep. 55) The crescent moon on Bad Cat’s lapel

27) (Ep. 56) “Some people are very good at disguising their true nature” in reference to Nox. It’s quite literal, in this case.

28) All the characters’ eyes are drawn in a very specific way, no matter their color (black shading taking up half the iris, the white shine). Every character except Nox, that is.

—Well, every character except Nox and the key’s human forms. I always thought it was meant to make him seem more intimidating (which it Does), but it really might be a byproduct of being a key. The queen in Friends and Family (Ep. 56) almost has Nox’s exact eye color, and her eyes are still colored in the usual way. So it’s definitely more than a stylistic choice.

—Makes me wonder what Nox looked like pre-key form. ..Did he still have his bright blue high beams..

29) Dreams by Day is about a key having a dream/flashback, and Dreams by Night is.. also about a key having a dream/flashback

———

And that’s all I have for now!! I’m absolutely going to find something else the millisecond I post this but like u said please add anything you notice.

[barbara-gordons-glasses]

I am an Omni-mark and amber enthusiast, so I have a few little headcanons for their BEAUTIFUL relationship. Pry these out of my cold dead hands and I will resurrect and beat you with a rock

OKAY

1.) Amber and O. Mark met when they were kids and O. Mark was already an outcast because he’s being raised solely by his father. Amber wasn’t weirded out by him like the other kids were so they became close friends.

2.) Once he got his powers, he told her immediately. No keeping secrets. He doesn’t think it’s necessary and he trusts Amber with his life.

3.) He asked her out as SOON as he realized he liked her, which was in late middle school to early high school.

4.) Their first date was a trip around earth, seeing everything Amber’s always wanted to visit. They end their date at a nice restaurant back in Chicago, even though I think O. Mark would want to give her something special. She thought it was enough.

5.) They’re very clingy. O. Mark is more open about it, while as Amber is more relaxed about it, unless they’ve been apart for a while (which is rarely)

6.) O. Mark braids Amber’s hair and uses red and white beads in her hair like his costume

7.) Amber gets excited when O. Mark has a “human” interest such as reading comic books or watching movies and gives all her attention to him if he talks about it so that he feels safe to keep talking

8.) Nolan’s a bitch but he knows his place

9.) the first time Amber met Nolan as O. Mark’s girlfriend, he hated her and she could sense that and gave him the same energy back, thus causing an argument

10.) Amber posts O. Mark all the time (in between posts about the world’s current events ofc) and O. Mark doesn’t even have a social media. If he did, he’d only follow Amber, only post Amber, and would spend all his time stalking Amber’s profiles

11.) O. Mark helps at the soup kitchen all the time, mostly to spend time with Amber but also because he can’t help but feel a little obligated to Earth and its people. Amber cares so much for them, after all

12.) College is rough for them. Not because of O. Mark’s hero work, but because the workload is so huge that they can barely talk. O. Mark would normally dismiss his work to spend time with her, but she threatens not to speak to him until he’s passing his classes, so he HAS to study

13.) O. Mark gets jealous easy, but hides it with anger and silence

14.) Amber doesn’t get jealous often—she’s confident in her relationship and she knows O. Mark will fight a bitch for her

15.) O. Mark, Amber, and William are best friends. O. Mark tolerates William and Amber loves him for his kindness and humor

16.) O. Mark and Amber go on double dates with William and his bf

17.) Amber dominates—I’M SORRY IM SORRY IT’S TRUE PLEASE PUT THE GUN DOWN

18.) O. Mark proposes during senior year of college and they get married quickly

19.) Nolan leaves earth around the time before they start college, so O. Mark doesn’t have any family on his side to attend the wedding. To make up for that, Amber invites her entire family, her entire friend group, and literally everyone she knows

19.) thanks to her impact, more than a hundred people show up, plenty for O. Mark’s side and her side

20.) the wedding photos are the only proof to everyone (but Amber) that he CAN smile

21.) Once they’re out of college, I like to think Amber became a social worker or something in the field of helping children or the disadvantaged

22.) I suspect Omni-Mark doesn’t want to work but doesn’t want Amber to be the sole provider, so he gets a job as a comic book writer (or artist). He doesn’t tell anyone but Amber but he enjoys it

23.) Amber and O. Mark talk about children often. Amber is for the idea and is willing to accept that her children may have powers and become heroes. O. Mark wants children but it deeply afraid that he’ll accidentally raise them like his dad raised him. He doesn’t want them to go through what he did. Amber assures they won’t.

24.) my personal fav is the moment someone mentions amber (whether it be a villain, hero, kid, adult, teen, whatever) he is FOCUSED. “Amber? Did you say Amber? Amber Bennett Grayson? My Amber? Why do you know her?”

25.) during the invincible war, he travels with the other invincibles to Main Mark’s timeline, which is set in the past. He doesn’t want to be there and he can’t wait to get home to Amber but then he sees her. Not his Amber, but Main Mark’s. She’s younger, still in college, but just as beautiful as ever. He takes her somewhere safe.

26.) his heart hurts when he realizes she’s afraid of him, and it just makes him want his amber back even more

Idk I love mark and amber so much and I NEED more fanfic writers on this relationship. PLEASE.

@seleneprince helped me out with a lot of these!!! 😋🩷🩷 great minds think alike

[cherrifire]

Please share your thoughts on the other 5 cutie marks, I'd love to hear!

Hi everypony! I got like 20 asks for the Dogwarts cutie mark lore so I'm here to speak my truth!

Before we start, I would like to write a quick reminder that a pony's cutie mark is not always their "special talent", but can also represent who they are, their personalities, and a possible destiny. Different cutie marks have different meanings and interpretations, but they're not just about representing what you're good at.

That being said, let's start with the cutie mark design I'm proudest of!

Ren's Cutie Mark

Ren's cutie mark is of a sunrise and looks pretty simple at first glance but there was a lot of thought that went into this one.

First of all, I bet you're wondering why a sunrise? Well, in the show, it is pretty typical for unicorns with great magical abilities to have one relating to space (examples being Twilight Sparkle, Sunset Shimmer, Starlight Glimmer, and Sunburst). And I figured since I wanted Ren to fall into a similar position of potentially becoming an alicorn, I gave him a cutie mark following the same trend. And I chose a sunrise to reflect the way Ren seems to glow when he enters a room. The way he carries himself is very warm and bright it just catches your eye in a similar way the sun would.

Also, Ren wears sunglasses. So a sun-themed cutie mark seemed appropriate.

Additionally, there are a couple of smaller details I want to point out too. Like the sun rays, if you look at them for a moment you'll see they're shaped like little crowns! I of course had to put a crown in thanks to how much Ren likes to play royalty, so I snuck it in there. And then the red spots underneath could both be interpreted as the sun reflected over water or blood. (But of course, this is a kid show AU so there wouldn't be any blood in Ren's destiny, just a fun reference to the red king and his whole thing about blood dyeing the snow red)

Martyn's Cutie Mark

I explained this one in an earlier ask but I thought I'd explain it again here for anyone who didn't see it!

Martyn's cutie mark is of a chopped log and a small stick.

This one is mostly a play on the name "Littlewood" but has other meanings too. As a character, Martyn tends to travel and explore quite a bit. In the Life Series specifically, he is usually the last one to find a permanent base and even then doesn't spend a lot of time in one place. Always on the move. Additionally, he's more of a wild card compared to other characters, always trying to be as unpredictable as possible.

The smaller detail here is the little swirl on top of the log is the same as the one on his Minecraft skin's shirt.

BigB's Cutie Mark

Cookies! Cookies! Cookies! BigB's cutie mark is of 3 cookies where one is trying to eat the others. There are also a few sprinkles there made to look like action lines.

We all know BigB loves cookies so of course I had to give him a cutie mark with cookies in it. For this one, I decided to follow the cutie mark trend of "symbol/item important to the pony duplicated 3 times" (examples being Fluttershy, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie Pie) but I added a bit more creativity to it with the top on trying to eat the others to represent just how tasty they are 😋

Additionally, rather than the first cookie trying to eat the others, you could interpret it as opening its mouth to talk. Because BigB can not keep a secret to save his life! In Double Life when he started "secret soulmates" with Grian, he didn't last a day without opening his mouth. He told Ren about it immediately because he felt bad for keeping things from him.

Also worth quickly mentioning: People pointed out in my original post that they don't think BigB would be the element of honesty because of his behaviour in Secret Life. But that's just Secret Life. I think Secret Life to BigB was like that episode of My Little Pony where Discord makes the main 6 act the opposite of their true element. BigB was just going through a weird phase of telling very obvious lies because a book told him to.

Skizz's Cutie Mark

Skizz's cutie mark is of a lightning bolt from a couple storm clouds hitting the ground.

I think this is the cutie mark with the least thought put into it, unfortunately. There was still though just not as much as the others. The big thing I thought was fun was I made the lightning bolt shaped like an "S" to stand for Skizzleman. But other than that, this cutie mark sort of has the same meaning as Rainbow Dash's cutie mark. Quick like lightning, loud, bold, dangerous, and powerful.

Impulse's Cutie Mark

Impulse's cutie mark is of a lit-up lightbulb.

I absolutely crowded this cutie mark with the letter i. If you look closely, there are 6 of them. Impulse's design also has an i-shaped pattern on the belly if you look closely enough. But that's more of a fun easter egg and doesn't exactly reflect Impulse as a character.

There are a couple of reasons I chose a lightbulb for Impulse, the first and probably most obvious is that he's a redstone guy! He's a technical guy who likes to work smarter, not harder. So I figured the My Little Pony equivalent would be a light bulb/electricity. The second reason for the lightbulb is that it's usually used as a visual representation when characters have that "eureka!" moment in cartoons. When someone has a brilliant idea a little lightbulb turns on above their head. So since Impulse is the ideas guy, I figured a lightbulb would work for his cutie mark.

Etho's Cutie Mark

Etho's cutie mark is of a snowflake with a missing branch.

I promise there is more to this cutie mark than just "Canada is cold" even if that's part of the reason I wanted to give him a winter-themed cutie mark. While it is fun to make a nod to Etho being Canadian, I thought a winter-themed cutie mark would be fun to represent how he sometimes presents himself. Cold and a bit mysterious. I think deep down once you get to know him, those attributes melt away, but for people who have never met him, he may be intimidating that way.

I'll be honest, I don't watch a lot of Etho content, but I do have a few friends who identify as Etho girlies so I did my research. I was told in his Minecraft Let's Play World, that he has a snowflake build somewhere. I believe they said it was an iron golem farm? (Please correct me if I'm wrong) but I thought that was perfect for the cutie mark. And if you're wondering why there's a branch missing, it's because one of my friends said he was incapable of finishing builds sometimes so I thought that would be fun to include.

-=+=-

Alright. Rant over. To celebrate, here are a few pony doodles so I can put this post in my art tag.

[morgana-larkin]

I was gonna have this out earlier but I was having major period cramps earlier so it's didn't really happen. Anyway, the story really takes a turn here. Not edited in the slightest and I hope you like it!

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26

Just Tired - Part 12

Warnings: Manipulative relationship (Mentioned), Swearing, Smut

Words: 4.05k

Melissa wakes up and looks over to beside her and expects a young woman there only to find it empty. She then looks around and sees that she’s in your room and some memories come to her brain.  She gets up, gets dressed and goes downstairs and sees you’re already up. 

“Morning, how do you feel?” You ask her.

“Not so good.” She says. “My memories are a little hazy, why am I in your house?” She asks you.

“Well I wasn’t there the entire time so I can only tell you what I know.” You say to her and she nods. “I went there because Barb was worried about you and I found you dancing with some young woman. You threw up when I tried talking to you but we had a discussion right after to which you childishly walked away and went back to dance. I stayed to keep an eye on you and then you began making out with some girl, apparently to hurt me, and then I walked out. You followed after me, and also tripped, I brought you back here to clean up the cut and then you fell asleep.” You explain and Melissa takes a few seconds to process what you just said as some memories were coming back to her. 

“I was such an ass to you.” She says and then comes to join you on the couch. You hand her a plate with some toast on it and she takes it. “Thank you.” She says and takes a bite.

“Why were you being an ass? You ignored me all week and then went on Friday and Saturday night to the bar alone. You mentioned that you thought I was moving on from you but nothing else. I mean why were you spiraling?” 

“Because I thought I was losing you and you make me feel safe. So I thought I was losing what makes me feel safe.” She explains.

“Well you don’t have to worry about that, I’m not going anywhere.” You tell her and she looks at you.

“Thank you.” She says softly. “And I’m sorry.”

“I understand. I’m your safety net right now and it’s scary when you think you could lose it.” You tell her and she looks down as a tear falls down her face. “Melissa.” You say and you gently grab her chin and get her to look at you. “I forgive you. I’m not mad at you at all. If anything I was worried about you.” You tell her and she looks at you in disbelief.

“You forgive me?” She asks softly and you nod. “But- but I hurt you and I wanted you to feel that way.” 

“True, you intended to hurt me and I was upset that you were making out with a girl, but your emotions were getting the best of you and you acted out to try and protect yourself and make yourself feel better.” You tell her and she looks down again. “Melissa, did Joe tell you it wasn’t ok to cry?” You ask her and she nods without looking at you. “It’s ok to cry, it’s part of being human and crying makes you feel better.”

“No, it’s not ok, it’s…” She chokes out and doesn’t finish the sentence.

“It’s what? What did he tell you?” 

“It means I’m too sensitive, too emotional and that it makes me look pathetic.” She says as more tears stream down her face.

“I can promise you right now that none of that is true.” You tell her and she looks at you. “You’re a strong independent woman, and maybe you’re a bit emotional right now but you just escaped hell. If you weren’t emotional then I’d be worried.” You tell her and you hear her sniffle as she tries to stop her crying. “Hey, you don’t have to stop, come here.” You tell her and she puts her plate down and she leans into your touch as you wrap your arms around her. 

As soon as you begin hugging her, it’s like a dam breaks and Melissa starts crying. She wraps her arms around you and just cries into your chest. She just keeps crying for a few minutes and then she starts slowing down and starts sniffing. You begin stroking her head and rub her back and you feel her hug you tighter. You reach over to the table in front of the couch and grab the box of tissue and you hand it to her. 

“Thank you.” She says, voice raspy from the crying as she grabs a tissue. 

“I’ll always be here to help you, Melissa.” You tell her and give her a kiss on the top of her head.

“How did I get so lucky with you?” 

“Well maybe the universe made sure I was born so that I could help you.” You tell her and she hums.

“I’m glad you were born.” She says.

“Me too.” You tell her and wrap your arms around her. “By the way, yesterday you mentioned something and I want to know if it’s true.” You say.

“What did I say?”

“You said that you told those 2 girls not to touch you when they took you home. Is that true?”

“Ya, I couldn’t go through with it. I mean how could I when all I thought about was you?” She says and you lean your head on top of her head. 

“That girl I went home with, I imagined you the entire time.” You tell her and she lifts her head up and looks at you. 

“I’m sorry that I’m not ready for anything. Right now I need something casual or one night or even friends.” She says and you cup her cheek.

“I understand.” You tell her and she looks into your eyes. “Maybe… maybe you'd be interested in casual dating.” You say to her.

“What’s casual dating?” 

“Well it’s two people that date but they’re not in a relationship, they don’t put a title on it. They can go on dates or have sex, but it’s not exclusive.” You explain.

“That does sound nice but I don’t really want to try dating apps or anything to find someone like that.” She says and looks down.

“Well maybe…we could.” You offer and she looks at you.

“Are you offering to be my casual date?” She asks and you nod. “Why?”

“Because we’re both attracted to each other but you’re not wanting to be in a relationship right now, so maybe we can explore some casual dating with each other.” You explain and she looks down as she thinks about it.

“Are you sure?” She asks and you nod.

“I’m sure.” You say and she sits up. 

“Well I guess that leaves one question then.” She says and you quirk your eyebrows. “Will you go on a date with me?” She asks and you smile before nodding.

“Yes I will.” You tell her and she smiles. 

“Is tonight good for you?” She asks you and you nod.

“I did everything yesterday so I got nothing going on today.” You say.

“Can you drive me to Barb’s house? I would like to get ready for this date.” She says and you look at your phone.

“It’s 9am, when do you want to go on this date?” You ask her.

“Noon?” She asks and you chuckle. 

“Ok, noon it is.” You confirm and then you drive her to Barb’s. “Hey Barb.” You tell her as you and Melissa walk through the door.

“Oh Melissa, are you ok?” She asks her.

“I’m alright, Y/n helped me yesterday and this morning. And I want to say I’m sorry for snapping at you and I hope you’re not mad at me.” She says to Barb.

“I was never mad at you, Melissa. I was so worried about you and I didn’t know what to do.” She says to Melissa and Melissa goes and hugs her. “Melissa, you’ve been my friend for 15 years, it’ll take a lot more than you snapping and slamming a door in my face to push me away.”

“Thank you, Barb.” She says and then turns to you. “I’ll see you in a few hours?” She asks you and you smile and nod.

“Am I picking you up or are you picking me up?”

“Hm, I’ll come pick you up.” She tells you and you nod.

“See you soon.” You say and then leave.

“So want to tell me what you guys are doing later?” Barb asks her.

“She told me about this thing called casual dating, where we date but we don’t have a relationship and we could still do physical things like kiss if we want.” She explains to Barb.

“So you two are dating then?”

“If today goes well then hopefully.” Melissa says with a smile before she goes upstairs to get ready.

Melissa pulls up a couple minutes after noon and knocks on your door. You open the door and Melissa's eyes widen and her brain freezes when she sees your outfit.

“Wow.” Melissa says breathlessly when she takes in your little red dress that gives her a view of your cleavage and bottom of your thighs. You blush at her compliment and then look at her outfit. 

“You look beautiful, Melissa, absolutely beautiful.” You tell her as you take in her outfit. She’s wearing the iconic leather pants and jacket and a very revealing and beautiful pink shirt. You also notice that she decided to have her hair in a ponytail and she did her makeup a bit differently.

“Thanks hon, are you ready?”

“Yep, where are we going?” You ask her.

“I thought of taking a walk in the park and stop by the ice cream shop and if you’re up for it, go to my room after.” She says and you quirk an eyebrow at her.

“Your room for what exactly? Talk? Make out? Sex?” You ask her.

“Any of those I wouldn’t mind to be honest.” She tells you and you playfully shove her as you walk past her and she giggles. 

Melissa drives you both to the park and you get out and have a stroll through it.

“So do you have any questions you want to ask, get to know me better?” Melissa asks you.

“Does this mean I have free range and will actually get answers?” You counter and she hums.

“Maybe, you won’t know unless you ask.” She says

“Alright, we can start easy, you said you have 8 siblings right?” You ask and she nods.

“Can’t believe you remember that but yes, 5 sisters and 3 brothers.” She tells you.

“And what are their names?” You ask her.

“Well there’s Kristen Marie, Marie, Marie Camille, Maria Christina, sister Toni, brother Tony, John Anthony and Seamus.” She says.

“Seamus? Why is his name so different from the others?”

“Different dad.” She tells you and you nod.

“Do you have a favourite sibling?”

“No, they’re all annoying.” She says but you can tell she loved all of them.

“Have you told any of them about your pending divorce?” You ask her and she shakes her head.

“I’ll only tell them when I’m actually divorced.” She tells you.

“Don’t you think they might ask questions on Thanksgiving or even Christmas when Joe is not there?” You ask and she hums.

“I didn’t think about that.” Is all she says. “My family doesn’t celebrate Thanksgiving but we do celebrate Christmas and it’s Marie’s turn this year to host the Christmas dinner.” She tells you.

“You said you were the oldest sibling, so shouldn’t they have some respect for you? So I’m sure they won’t mind that you’re getting a divorce.” You tell her and she chuckles.

“Hon, this is an Italian family. They can be old fashioned at times.”

“You said they’ll only take you out of the loop, but they’ll still be your family.” You tell her and she shrugs.

“I guess. Since you asked some family questions, I want to ask you some.” She tells you and you nod.

“Ask away.” You tell her and she goes and asks a few questions about your family as you both walk around the park. She finishes asking you questions and you notice the tire swing is free. “Come on.” You say and take her hand before leading her to the tire.

“Where are you taking me?” She asks while laughing.

“To the tire swing of course!” You say and tell her to get on.

“Hon, I’m too old for it.” She says and crosses her arms.

“Get on the damn tire.” You say and challenge her with your gaze. She sighs before she goes and gets on the tire. She gets on one side and rests her feet in the middle of the tire on the other side. You go underneath the tire and pop up in the middle of it, in between her legs.

“Well that’s a view.” She says and you roll your eyes playfully before you hold the rope of the tire and do a run and jump on the tire, with your legs in between hers, as it starts swinging you both. You see Melissa starts laughing as you both swing on it and you decide to do something extra. You stop the tire from swinging and stand back in the middle before you start spinning it around, twisting the rope. “What are you doing?” She asks and you smirk.

“You’ll see.”

“I don’t know if I want to find out as you’re smirking.” She says and you giggle. Once you’re satisfied you’ve twisted it enough, you do the run and jump again. Only this time it’s untwisting as it swings.

“Aaaahhh!” Melissa yells out before she starts laughing. “This is a lot of fun.” She says as you’re still swinging.

“I did this all the time as a kid.” You say.

“I don’t doubt that.” She says through giggles. When the swing stops, you stand in the middle again to get it to swing again but Melissa stops you by wrapping her legs around your waist and brings you closer to her.

“Careful Ms. Schemmenti, there’s kids around.” You tell with a flirty tone and she hums.

“How can I be careful when you’re in front of me, in between my legs?” She asks and you smile.

“You find it hot when I’m between your legs?” You ask her and she nods.

“Very much so.” She says and she leans forward for a kiss but you place a finger on her lips. “You’re stopping me again?” She asks after you remove your finger.

“Oh I’m going to kiss you but not in the middle of the playground.” You tell her and get out from the tire and go behind her and you grab the rope close to where her hands are and place your head on her shoulder. “Because when I start kissing you, I won’t want to stop.” You say and start spinning the tire, twisting the rope. Once you twist it quite a bit, you let go and watch as Melissa is spinning and laughing. Once it's done moving, she looks at you with a smile. 

“Help me get off of this thing.” She says and you hold your hand out for her and she takes it and gets off. “Thank you, that was a lot of fun.” She tells you and you move back on the sidewalk as some kids come to play on the tire.

“How about we go to the ice cream shop now?” You ask her and she nods and she holds your hand as you walk to the ice cream shop. You both enter the shop and look at all the different choices before you decide on chocolate.

“Of course you go with chocolate, you chocoholic.” She says and you wink at her before she orders. You go and get your card out but then you hear a beep and look to see that Melissa already tapped her card on the machine and paid for both.

“You’re sneaky.” You say and she smiles at you before she gets handed her ice cream. A few seconds later you get handed yours. “Thank you.” You tell the worker and then you both walk out of the shop and start walking and eating your ice cream. Melissa glances at you as you take a big lick of your ice cream and she can’t help her mind from going places. 

“Is there anything else that tongue is good at licking?” She asks and you look at her with a smirk. 

“There is one other thing that I have some experience with.” You tell her and she gets wet between the legs.

“Let’s walk back to my car, and maybe drive us back to Barb’s? She’s not home right now and she won’t be home until the evening.” She says and you both start walking to her car while eating your ice cream. 

You get back to her car just as you both finish eating and then you get in and she drives you both to her temporary home. You get out after putting her car in park and she lets you both in and you take her hand and lead her to the bedroom. You enter her room and close the door before you bring her to the bed and you both sit down on the side of the bed. You can tell she’s a bit nervous so you cup her cheek and get her to look at you.

“We don’t have to do anything.” You tell her.

“I want to do it with you but this time I’ll want to be touched.” She tells you and you hum.

“And not only will you be touched, you’ll have an orgasm or multiple ones.” You say and she blushes and looks away.

“It’s been awhile since that’s happened.” She says and you lean forward and kiss her. She wraps her arms around your waist and pulls you closer to her. She then leans forward and pushes you backward and you get on your back. While kissing her you take her leather jacket off and fling it across the room. She runs her hands all over her body before she holds your hands and moves your arms over your head. “Is there a zipper on the dress or do I just pull it off?” She asks and you smile.

“Just pull it off.” You say and help her as she pulls it off of you and she looks at your half naked body.

“God, you’re so sexy.” She says as she touches all over your body. You reach for the hem of her shirt and then you take it off and freeze when you see her boobs in a fantastic bra and you get a better look at them. “I think you’re obsessed with my tits.” She says.

“How could I not with how big they are?” You ask and she giggles before she gets on your lap and pulls you up in a seated position. She cups both your cheeks and kisses you before she trails her down and goes behind to unclip your bra. She flings it across the room without looking and touches all over your exposed stomach before she looks.

“You look so beautiful.” She says and you tuck a strand behind her ear and she leans into your touch.

“You’re so sweet. I want to see your body as well, are you ok with that?” You ask and she nods.

“Please.” She says and you immediately unclip her bra and take it off and your mouth waters at the sight. “Please touch them all you want, Joe barely touched them.” She says and you look at her in shock.

“He had access to these magnificent boobs and he barely touched them?” You ask and she nods. “He’s such a fucking idiot.” You say before you lean forward and put a nipple in your mouth. She gasps at the sensation and puts her hands in your hair so you don’t move. You pay attention to what gets the most noises out of her and repeat the movements that she likes the best. After you’re satisfied enough, you switch to the other one and do the same movements that she likes. She ends up pulling you off of her and gets you on your back and puts one of your nipples in her mouth. Pretty much anything she does will get sounds out of you and she’s enjoying pleasing you. When she finishes with both nipples she trails up to your neck and sucks on it. “Oh god, Melissa.” You gasp out and she smirks as she feels you rub your thighs together. She slowly peels your underwear off of you and sees how wet you are.

“You’re soaking.” She says and runs a finger through your folds and you moan and buck your hips.

“Please, I need you.” You beg and she smiles before she slips a finger inside of you and you gasp.

“You’re so wet and tight, you feel perfect.” She says as she starts pumping. She then adds another finger and you buck your hips before she pins you down with her free hand. She then curls her fingers inside of you and you see stars and she goes faster as well. She then trails her free hand down and circles your clit.

“Oh my god, don’t stop.” You say and she watches as you get closer and closer to an orgasm. You wrap your hands in her hair and tighten them as you’re at the edge. Melissa feels you clench around her fingers and your legs shake. You then let go and your orgasm rushes through you. “Oh my god.” You say as you catch your breath. You then wrap your arms around her waist and flip you both so you’re on top and she’s underneath you.

“Oof.” She says and then you kiss her and she moans into the kiss. You trail down to her neck and make sure to leave a couple hickeys on her neck. You then take off her leather pants and underwear and see how wet she is.

“You’re perfect.” You say and you see the blush that makes its way on her cheeks and you think she couldn’t look more beautiful. You kiss all over her chest as you play with a nipple and she’s moaning underneath you.

“Please, stick a finger inside of me.” She begs and how can you deny her anything? You trail a hand down and slip a finger inside her. “Oh my god, that feels so good.” She gasps out as you pump your finger inside of her. 

You then go down to her pussy and you kiss her clit before you start licking and sucking on her. She starts bucking her hips and you pin her down as you keep going. She puts her hands in your hair and moves her hands all over your hair as you keep giving her pleasure. Melissa then feels her orgasm start to build and she almost can’t believe it. It keeps getting stronger and stronger as she gets closer to her orgasm and she tightens her hold on your hair. 

“Oh god oh god! I’m so close!” She yells out before her orgasm washes all over her and she lets go of your hair.

“Do you want another one? I can give you two orgasms.” You offer and she chuckles.

“No, I’m good with just the one for now, come up here.” She tells you and you go lay beside her.

“How do you feel?” You ask her as she wraps an arm around you and pulls you to her body.

“I feel so good. I can’t even find the right words for how good I feel.” She says to you and you smile as you lay your head on her chest. “Thank you.” She tells you before she gives you a kiss on the top of your head.

“Anytime.” You tell her and wrap an arm around her waist and get comfortable. Melissa hums at the feeling and then she looks up at the ceiling and smiles.

Taglist: @esposadejoyhuerta 

@imaginesmultifandoms 

@idonothingalldays-blog 

@sexysapphicshopowner 

@dvrkhcld 

@lilfartbox1

@ricejucie 

@unicorniusfallapatorius

@a-queen-and-her-throne

@sleep-deprived-athlete

@og-kxsh-420

@sasheemo

@midnight-lestrange

@dashbag-art

@morgananyx

@schmentisgf

@cblanchetts

@that-october-night

@schemmentigfs

@italianaidiota

@ambessas-doll

@ankhsta

@olderwomenenthusiast

@ackleybloodybridge

@angelcorner

@creaturesaphique

@cupldscntrl

@calliopetworld

@alwaysgoodnight

@yoyo-w

Let me know if you want to be added!

[sandrakir31]

Can you share with me some headcanons only about Chase

Hi! Sorry it took so long, I needed to think.

1. Chase is a polyglot and loves to learn new languages.

2. In fact, Chase could cook food just fine, he just lacks the practice.

3. On Cybertron, Chase was originally some kind of accountant, but he really wanted to become a police officer, so he joined the ranks of the rescuers.

4. Chase hides from Whirl in Heatwave's office. Incidentally, he and Blades swap cadets quite often.

5. Most of the fiction Chase reads was recommended to him by Boulder. However, he is not so interested in art.

6. Among book detectives, Chase likes Hercule Poirot the most. However, he uses Sherlock Holmes' method of deduction quite often in practice.

7. Chase doesn't really understand what "being cool" means. He just takes Heatwave and Blades at their word.

8. Sometimes Chase only pretends to listen to someone. This happens when the plot of the book is too exciting to pay attention to reality. But he will always pay attention to the notes of sadness in someone else's voice!

9. Chase knows Strongarm. She was the one who gave him several pairs of handcuffs after Sideswipe was stranded on the island.

10. Chase can move the antennae on his head, but it is done unconsciously and barely noticeably.

11. When Boulder is busy, Chase helps Graham with his homework. The same goes for Cody.

12. When Chase learns something new from history or politics, he first checks with Charlie to make sure he understood the meaning correctly, and later discusses it with Heatwave.

13. Chase actually tries to get into hockey, only because Heatwave likes the sport.

14. Sometimes Chase watches True Crime, but forbids Blades from being around while doing so.

15. One time, Chase had to spend a lot of time persuading Huxley to delete a stupid video of him.

16. Chase is an ISTJ. In fact, he is one of the best workers in many areas. However, if he thinks that he knows a "better solution" that he has calculated logically, then that's what he will do.

17. Chase takes on the role of the team's defender in any situation. Sometimes others literally have to grab him by the arms or shoulders because he is always putting himself in danger.

18. Chase is an absolute pro at every game, but he keeps it a secret.

19. Chase has a gun, he just doesn't like using it most of the time.

20. Chase is left-handed.

Humanization version:

1. Chase doesn't sleep much because he works so much. The only thing that helps him fall asleep is chamomile tea (or hugs, but he won't admit it).

2. Chase is English with German and Japanese family roots.

3. Chase has his own small library at home.

4. As one of his hobbies, Chase writes scientific papers, which Charlie helps him publish. When necessary, he defends the papers online.

5. Chase could have a cat or fish as a pet, but he is rarely home. By the way, he only dislikes Mr. Pettipos because he considers him rude, but he will never say it out loud.

6. When it comes to food, Chase loves seafood the most.

7. Chase always smells like he just got out of the shower.

8. In addition to his work in the police, Chase works remotely in IT.

9. Chase has several cacti in his work area because Boulder said they absorb "bad moods."

10. Chase visits the traumatologist more often than others.

[vibratingskull]

The first step to mend always hurts

Part1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36

Tags : Reader is disabled, fluff, self-doubts, therapy, support, ED mention, Cunni, Thrawn is a voracious puss eater

You go back to work, trying to remain amicable to Konstantine, and soon enough your first therapy rendez vous come up with Thrawn to support you

Thrawn x F!reader

“What?!” Admiral Konstantine sneers. 

You try really hard not to sigh or raise your voice at the face of your superior. Seated behind his desk, a datapad neglectfully lying on the cold metal next to his glass of alcohol, half empty by now, he observes you like you’re spouting nonsense to his face. 

“I said, I will need the Relentless and the Chimaera to meet, Sir.” 

“And what might be the reasons for that outrageous demand?” 

“Medical reasons.” 

“We have a med bay on board of the Relentless, you are going nowhere.” He decides. 

“I already spoke to Grand Admiral Thrawn, and he agreed.” You politely let him know. 

You see his nostrils flaring and his eyebrow frowning in disgust and indignation. 

“Oh! So you took the liberty to ask directly to the big hat before informing your own Admiral and superior, I see.” He is pissed off. 

You remain silent, letting him agitate himself in his chair, pestering about his godly authority being bypassed by a mere Commander. You internally sigh, after years of service under his lead, Admiral Konstantine didn’t find favour in your eyes, remaining a little man in a uniform too big for him, but not his ego. 

“You tend to take your ease a little too much since you started to buddy-up with the Grand Admiral Thrawn, maybe a reminder of your true position would do all of us good for your future work.” 

You merely raise an eyebrow in response. 

Oh, if only he knew the true nature of your relationship with Thrawn, he would choke. 

He keeps going. 

“I saw plenty of your species in my time, little officers agglomerating around bigger fishes in the hope their power would shine on them too. But it will not work with me, Commander. You will go back to your post while I think of an appropriate sentence for your transgression. It is time discipline gets back on the ISD and among the troops. Your behavior is simply unacceptable.” 

“I take it your response is a ‘no’.” You just note. 

“What you suggest is grotesque and simply impossible. Do you think we will force two entire ISDs to meet for you to go see a doctor?” 

“I never suggested we force them to comply with my agenda; on the contrary, my appointment has been determined by the ISD’s road route. We decided on a date when the two will join organically on the campaign.” 

“That could not happen for months” 

“The Relentless is part of Grand Admiral Thrawn’s fleet, they will inevitably join their forces, more often than you’re ready to accept.” 

He grumbles lowly, seething at the mouth. He hates it when the Relentless join back the Chimaera to resume a campaign because Thrawn is the ultimate authority, and you came to understand Konstantine loves his little power when he is away from the Chiss. 

“My answer is still no.” He finally decides. 

“Then I will let you explain to the Grand Admiral why his orders won’t be obeyed.” 

“You are still under my authority.” 

“The Grand Admiral’s powers surpass you. In the end, we are all his officers.” 

At that point you see the thought of throwing his mug at your face crosses his mind. 

He restrains himself. 

“I will personally give him my opinion about this whole situation, reminding him very… politely that the Navy has priorities to follow.” He says, a thin layer of venom transpiring through his voice. 

A beeping sound resonates in the office. 

“Look who’s calling me!” He says assuredly, but you hear a point of stress, “I can guide him back to reason here and now! You are not needed anymore, go back to your post.” 

He shushes you out of the room with disdained hand movement. You bow your head slightly and exit the office, readjusting your hat on your head. 

If he wants to argue with Thrawn after all, that is his problem. 

You look at your chrono. Thrawn’s leave ended literally 30 minutes ago, and his first order of business is keeping Konstantine in a straight line. 

Poor Thrawn. 

Managing people like Konstantine and Pryce must be so exhausting… 

You go back to the bridge with assured steps as the Relentless is speeding back to Lothal via Hyperspace. 

------------------------------------------ 

You hold the datacard in your hand, playing with it nervously as you cower on your seat. 

“Everything is going to be fine.” Thrawn assures you. “They are professionals.” 

“I am terribly nervous.” You admit. 

Less than a day after the Relentless and the Chimaera joined back the fleet, Thrawn called you to notice your therapy appointment was today. Whatever argument between Thrawn and Konstantine took place, Konstantine lost. 

You’re grateful to Thrawn for planning your appointment because, at the first signs of difficulties, you would have gone back on your word, given how stressed it makes you feel. 

But Thrawn took care of everything, and as he promised he is with you for the first session.  

Despite his cramped agenda. 

“I’m sorry to force you to come with me…” You feel the first shudders coming. 

“It was your condition for you to go to therapy.” He dismisses it like it is nothing. 

“Oh my god, I’m so stressed…” You feel sickness lying at the bottom of your stomach, ready to rise at any inconvenience. 

“There is no need to be stressed. Did you eat today?” 

You wince. With your stomach in knots, eating is the last thing on your mind. 

“No. I couldn’t…” 

“I guessed it.” And he takes out something from his large pocket, “Eat.” 

He hands you a bright colored, exotic fruit that you take without conviction. You start peeling it with your nails, not at all hungry. 

“I saw the results of your latest medical examination, and you lost weight again. Do you eat properly on the Relentless?” He continues, suspicious. 

“I eat.” You promise. 

“Properly?” He insists. 

“... I eat.” You repeat, lowering your head before him. 

You hear him take a deep breath. You purse your lips in silence, ready for the berating. 

“I also saw your latest athletic scores.” He keeps his voice steady, “You are still not back up to the Imperial standards, but you have made undeniable progress. I am proud of you.” 

You turn to him with eyes round and mouth agape. 

He doesn’t berate you? No patronizing speech? 

“You are?” You ask incredulously. 

“Of course. You worked really hard to get back on level with everyone else. I can only encourage you to pursue your efforts and support you.” He responds softly. “Eat.” 

You wince at the fruit you were just rotating in your hand to precisely not eat it. 

“Do it for me.” 

You sigh and bite into the flesh of the fruit. It is fresh and juicy, and tastes delicious. You moan with delectation as you feel a drop of juice running down your chin. 

“I want you to follow a proper diet, EDs are as dangerous as any other disorders.” Thrawn summoned you, “I will ask the med droids to give you a diet plan, and I expect you to follow it. Can I count on you?” 

You gulp. 

“I don’t even have an ED, you're dramatizing.”  

“You are on the verge of getting one. This is also why therapy is an excellent means to heal both the body and the spirit.” He preaches gently. 

You finish the fruit, licking your hand full of juice droplets.  

“Why didn’t you go to therapy then?” You ask. 

“I never felt the need.”  

“Did you, now? I thought you saw your fair share of atrocities.” You do not dare pronounce the word brother, but he understood it by himself. 

“I suffered immensely at his disparition.” He admits, “But I knew therapy could never heal the wounds he left on my heart, that it was simply… Inadequate for my temperament. So I carried on as I always did.” And he closes himself back as an oyster. 

So he suffered in silence. 

How many wounds did he suffer without ever sharing his pain? How many years of anguish did he amass under his flesh? 

“I am sorry, Thrawn…” You try, “I just wish… I just want you to know you can tell me anything.” You seize his hand delicately and squeeze it. 

He lifts your hand to his lips and kisses it with so much tenderness you feel your heart melt. 

“One day, Cha’cah.” He promises, “One day I will tell you everything. But today is not a good day for it. We are here for you.” 

You look at his profile, his regal features, his calm and assured expression, but his eyes are strangely dark and feverish. 

He is also sweating. 

“Are you alright?” You ask, taking your hand off his grip to take his temperature at his forehead. 

“I already took two showers since this morning.” He lets out with a slightly annoyed sigh. 

“But why? Are you ill? Are you in any pain?” 

He turns his head to you with his dark eyes full of meaning. 

Oh… Oh 

“You are having a crisis right now?” You ask, flushing terribly at the memories of his first rut together. 

“It started early this morning, but being with you in a small, closed space is quite… challenging.” 

“Oh no. Thrawn, I am so sorry, if you need to leave because you’re too uncomfortable, I understand perfectly. I can do it, no need for you to suffer like that, I-” 

“Nonsense.” He cuts you short, pulling slightly on his collar, “I promised you.” 

“Yes, you did… Before a new crisis arose!” You insist. 

“Do not trouble yourself for me. It is not as dire as it was at our apartment.” He argues. 

You heart flutters. 

‘Our apartment’. 

“Do… Do my panties… help at least?” You ask, flushing even more in embarrassment. 

“Indeed, they do. It is quite a relief to be able to inhale your pheromones when I take care of myself, it eases a lot of the tension.” He reveals without any shame. 

You’re going TO DIE of embarrassment. A sudden picture of Thrawn masturbating in his large bed with your panties pressed to his nose, deeply inhaling your scent, flashes in your mind, and you squirm in your seat. 

“Good, good…” You let out with a small voice, gulping. 

He turns his head slightly to you as you look at the wall in front of you, taking great care not to cross his gaze. 

“You know…” He starts with a low, deep voice, “They are really efficient, but they wear off so quickly. I will soon need another batch for my needs.” He whispers in your ear softly, his breath blowing on the outer shell of your ear. “How do you suggest we remedy it?” 

You shudder immediately at the magnitude of that voice. 

“Thrawn!” You whisper indignantly like someone could hear you, “We are in a waiting room of a doctor!” 

“There is nobody else, only us, cheo Cha’cah.” He tilts his head, amused. 

“This is so improper, Grand Admiral!” You squeal. 

He only chuckles, straightening back on his seat. 

“I am playing with you, Cha’cah.” 

“Please don’t.” You stutter, your cheeks on fire. 

You remain silent for a minute, where you could only hear your heart pounding in your chest. You breathe deep, trying to calm down. 

“Where are we going next?” You ask, trying to ease the thick atmosphere, “What are the orders?” 

“The Relentless will remain over Lothal while the Chimaera will hunt down the Wyvern.” He explains, “I already ordered Konstantine to let you embark the Chimaera.” 

Ah yes, the Wyvern, the ISD the Rebellion managed to steal from the Empire… 

“Why?” You inquire. 

“Someone giving the orders clearly seemed to know you, maybe even personally. I want you to help us identify patterns and profiles.” 

This makes sense. You remember that rebel voice, calling your name when you only gave your family name. Whoever they are, they gained access to some private intel on officers. 

“Are you sure they didn’t simply learn my name with the files available on the Wyvern?” 

“That is also a possibility, but I want to try every lead possible. Stealing an ISD is an unprecedented feat, and it requires grand measures.”  

You nod silently. 

It appears you will remain on the Chimaera for some time. 

With Thrawn. 

Together. 

You feel your heart pounding again. 

After ten months away from each other, you spent a week together, and now you’ll move in with him for an undisclosed period of time. 

You’re so glad, even if it is only for work, you will be with him. 

“Miss (F/n)?” The doctor passes the sliding door. 

You both enter the office, which is cold and austere, with only metal everywhere except for the bed and the armchair of the therapist. 

You sit down in front of the desk, giving her the datacard that she immediately clicks into her datapad to start reading it. 

You gulp as you see her eyes traveling up and down her screen in silence, taking note of your medical exams, your health record, and the notes of the therapist who saw you three times at the hospital. You dig your nails into your seat. Thrawn is cool and calm next to you, awaiting her judgment patiently. 

“What do you hope for coming to see me, miss (F/n)?” She finally asks, her reading finished. 

“To heal.” You dumbly respond. 

“Healing is a broad word holding different meanings from person to person. What does it mean to you?” 

You lose all your words. 

What does healing mean to you? Do you wish to be reborn? To simply mute the pain and be numb to it? Another thing? 

You purse your lips silently, thinking, when Thrawn's hand comes holding yours, tensed around the seat. You look up to his sincere eyes to see his undying support and love. 

“I think for now… I just wish to stop suffering.” You decide. 

She tilts her head, looking at you. 

“I ask that question because for some enlisted, they realize the response to their problems was to quit the Navy ultimately.” Her gaze travels to her Grand Admiral, his hand still on yours, “I suppose you do not wish that, Grand Admiral?” 

“What I wish for is not what matters; what matters is her healing journey.” He responds coldly. 

She raises her hand peacefully to ease the tension. 

“I was simply making sure. Did you already do therapy before, miss?” 

“No.” 

“Do you know how we proceed?” 

“Yes.” 

“Do you wish the Grand Admiral to remain during our appointments?” 

“He can?” You blink. 

“He is the Grand Admiral.” 

“I… No. I would rather not.” You turn to him with “sorry” spelled in your eyes, but he thinly smiles at you, comforting you. 

“Could you remain silent about my presence here?” Thrawn asks 

“I am tied by professional confidentiality.” She nods, “I will not speak of you, Grand Admiral.” 

He nods back lightly when his comlink rings. He takes a look at it before shutting it down. 

“I am called on the bridge.” He turns to you to await your reaction. 

You smile gently at him, squeezing his hand, remaining discreet in front of a stranger. He squeezes your hand back gently, looking straight into your eyes with a tight smile, and exits the office. You look at him with questions in your eyes.  

Wasn’t his hand trembling when he took yours? He seemed worse than in the waiting room. 

You hope the crisis isn’t too hard… 

“Alright, I will explain one or two things and then I will dive deeper into some matters for today.” she announces. 

When you go out one hour later, your brain is fried, full of info. Your comlink rings. 

It’s Thrawn. 

“Come to my office.” 

------------------------------------------- 

“Thrawn?” You call, passing the head in his office. 

He is sitting in his chair, strangely tense and straight, his shoulders appear so… Stiff. 

“How was it?” He asks. 

You stop dead in your tracks. What kind of voice is that? You hear compassion, but there is something underlying, something hidden in plain sight, veiled and dangerous. 

Something predatory. 

“Great? I think… She mostly spoke for today. Explaining things.” The door closes behind you. 

“Good.” You hear him take a painful breath, like his lungs are compressed. “I hope you will be at ease for your next appointment.” 

He keeps worrying about you, but you’re worrying about him. 

You gulp. 

“Are you alright?” 

“I am at war with myself.” He mysteriously lets out. 

So you were right. His state degraded, his rut slowly gnawing at his common sense. 

“Do you want me to help?” You immediately ask, ready to jump into action, ready to serve your man. 

You hear a faint chuckle coming from him. 

“I do not want to force you into anything, Cha’cah.” 

“You called for me.” You retort. 

“A moment of weakness.”  

“Then you’re in an even worse state than we realized.” You start unbuttoning your green jacket nonchalantly, before extending your hand to him with a gentle smile. 

He remains still, unmoving, silent, but his burning eyes darted at you. 

Only you. 

“I do not think this is a good idea.” He slowly says, with an unmistakable tension in his voice. 

“We already talked about it. You called for me and I am here. Take my hand, love.” You try the pet name to sweeten him. 

And it apparently works, after a visible shudder in his shoulders, he slowly gets up, skirts his desk elegantly, and walks up slowly to you to grip your hand. He intertwines your fingers and squeezes your hands.  

He is undeniably hotter than usual, warming up your own body by sheer proximity. He trembles too, very lightly, but it is here. 

“What are you afraid of?” You ask him, whispering. 

You’re forced to raise your head to look up to him because of how tall he is. His forehead is crossed by a line of tension and you see him gulp, a thin veil of sweat at his temples. 

“I do not want to hurt you.” He confesses, his red eyes diving into yours. “If I ever did it, I could never pardon myself.” 

“You’re not going to hurt me, Thrawn. I am a big girl.” 

“You do not know what you are talking about.” He whispers back. 

“Try me.”  

“I should not.” 

“Then why call me?” 

He freezes imperceptibly. Clearly he hadn’t made peace with his condition and is still working on the idea of asking for your help. 

That man, you swear… Always trying to bear the load alone! 

You’ll need to sweeten him into action. 

You raise on your tiptoes to capture his lips. He doesn’t react, which is a testimony to his headspace. He was never afraid of casual physical affection before, but today, he seems closed off, even to you. 

You part your hands to circle them around his neck, you peck his lips repeatedly. 

Muah! Muah! Muah! 

His hands came to your hips, barely holding them like a feather touch. 

“Will you not kiss me at the very least?” You pout. 

He finally responds, opening his lips to yours, and you enter his mouth to hug and dance with his tongue. You sigh, satisfied against his lips, brushing your breast against his large chest.  

His skin is burning under your touch, you scent sweat mixed with his natural musk. 

His hands get more daring as the kiss deepens, one of them comes at the back of your head to prevent you from parting from his lips, and the other sneakily slides under your black tank top. You moan seductively, waving your body against his tall one, kissing him languorously, squeezing him in your arms, his large, warm hand fists in your hair, and caressing your back, delicately at first, then with more and more evident signs of urgency. 

He pushes you against a wall and traps you against his chest. You hear his purr starting in his chest and throat. 

You do not complain. Far from that. 

You love that sound. 

You love being trapped against his hot, warm body. Being at his complete mercy. 

It is exciting. 

The kiss gets more demanding and urgent, and you let him take the reins. 

He bites your lower lip before parting from you, leaving you both panting. 

“What do you need, Thrawn? Tell me.” You encourage him to put his desire into words. 

“I need… You.” He finally admits. 

It looks like it cost him to admit such a thing; he doesn't relinquish control and power easily. Conceding such a thing must be a huge blow to his Chiss pride. Being vulnerable is an admission of weakness for him, and he cannot be weak. 

Not him! Not with all he has to accomplish. 

“You have me. Whole. Body and soul.” You kiss his nose and hear his purr getting higher. “What do you want to do?” 

What is his relation to desire? How does he feel it in his flesh? Is it a rare occurrence or a constant in his life? How can you help him navigate it? Your mind is racing while you wait for his response, which takes its sweet time to come. 

But you wait patiently, you do not want to pressure him. 

“I would like to taste you.” His hands come to your cheek to pull into an infinitely tender kiss before he dives back his rubies in your eyes, “Would you allow it? Would you let me eat you out?” Enthusiasm seems to win him over as a starved curiosity appears to devour him. 

You’ve never done that… 

That calms down your ardor spectacularly. 

No guys you’ve been with were ever interested to go down on you while you regularly sucked them off. Or they promised they would take care of you another time, saying sweet nothing to your ears, letting you do all the work as some kind of kings.  

It was kinda expected, that’s how things work: You take care of them until they get hard, you do the deed, cuts to the next day. That’s your role as a girlfriend. That’s how it works. 

“I, huh…” 

You’re not so sure to be down for that. You purse your lips, biting the inside of your cheek. He looks at you, or rather devours you with his rubies, hanging on to your lips, you feel hope and great anticipation bubbling under his hot skin. 

“I… Wouldn’t you prefer I suck you off?” You propose, after a wince, trying to correct the direction of this conversation. 

“No.” He responds without missing a beat, “I want to eat you. I need it.” He hammers each and every word home, detaches them each for you to clearly understand. “Please, Cha’cah?”  

“Are you sure? Is it not kinda… beneath you?” 

He frowns like he doesn’t understand a word you are saying.  

“This is a pressing desire, Cha’cah. I really want it.” 

His fine mask of calm and sternness is firmly in place, but his eyes… Fixing you, mad with desire, excitement, and expectations.  

You kinda cornered yourself with this one, you realize. His thumbs gently brush your cheeks, his tall body pressing you tight against the wall, and you can feel his breath on your lips. 

“I…” You start, noticing his eyes lighting up as you speak, full of hope. 

You don’t have the heart to turn him down, not when he has such expressive eyes… 

You bite your lips, feeling you’re going to regret this. 

“Alright… ?” 

He remains mute before sighing in relief, like it was eating him inside. He captures your lips again, languorously kissing you like your first kiss, before leaning forward to seize your legs and carry you bridal style towards his desk. You cannot help a yelp of surprise. He carries you like you weigh nothing; you feel so light in his arms, like a little girl. 

He lays you down on his desk and immediately sits down on his chair, between your hanging legs, and opens his white jacket wide. By reflex, you close your thighs as you tense your back. 

“Make yourself comfortable, Cha’cah.” He says, already breathless with anticipation, “Let me take care of everything and enjoy.” You hear the distinct sound of purring starting to get louder and louder. 

“This is not too late for a blow job!” You try to deter him with enthusiasm to tempt him. 

But he simply pushes you down gently with his hand, not hearing a word you’re saying. He seems deaf to anything, his sharp mind fogged by the rut and fixated only on what you promised him. He has the expression he wears when he is winning a battle, a thin, lopsided, smug grin on his lips, eyes sharp and focused on the prize. 

You gulp, terrified. 

You lay down his desk, fiddling with your fingers. 

You feel his expert hands making quick work of your pants, sliding them down your legs. He leans forwards to kiss your venus mont delicately, leaving butterfly kisses on the sensitive thin skin making you clench your pussy in reaction. It feels like he is worshiping something holy.  

It is weird to be the subject of worship, you purse your lips nervously, usually it’s you on your knees and not the other way around.  

He only fingered you last time because you helped him first. 

But today? 

Why would he want to go down on you without you reciprocating? Nobody does that! 

Not your previous partners. No one. 

“Hum, here?” You try to stop that immoral situation, getting back into a sitting position. “Maybe a Grand Admiral’s office isn’t a proper place to do it, maybe we-” 

“Stop questioning everything. I will eat you in my office, on my desk, and wherever I wish.” He cuts you with feverish eyes and a voice heavy with meaning that makes you shut up. 

He pushes you back down and hooks your panties to slide them along your legs. Your legs are still firmly closed, and you feel his large hands slide between the flesh of your thighs to open them to him. You can’t help an embarrassed moan as he opens them easily with his superior strength, exposing you to his gaze. You immediately hide your sex under your hands by instinct. You feel him grope your hips and pull you towards him and the edge of the desk. 

“Ah!” you yelp. 

“Relax, cheo Cha’cah. Let me take care of everything.” He seizes your dangling legs and throws them on his shoulders. 

His hands snake their way all up your legs, caressing your flesh sensually until he reaches your hands that he delicately cups and pulls away, holding your wrists firmly in his fist. You moan pitifully and try to close your legs back, only managing to cage his head between your knees. 

That’s when the cold realization that you cannot hide from him hits you, your breath gets stuck in your throat, and you feel panic slowly rising. 

You then feel warm fingers grazing your pussy lips incredibly softly but you cannot help a shudder at the touch. 

“Shhhhhhhhhhh…” Thrawn whispers, “Have faith in me, Cha’cah. I will take such good care of you. You are going to enjoy yourself in excess and satisfy me on the same occasion.” You hear in his voice he is completely entranced by what he is seeing. 

You gulp, feeling the fire of his gaze burning your sensitive flesh as he observes you like he is observing a canvas of a grand master. You feel your legs start trembling under such thorough inspection. Not even your gynecologist looks at you so rigorously! You refrain a lament as he trails your slit with the ghost of a touch, before flicking your clit with his thumb, delighting himself in the irrepressible tremor of your body, his purring intensifying. 

“I… It’s just… Nobody ever… looked at me that close. That is so embarrassing…” You confess, your cheek burning with shame. 

“Nobody took the time to honor such a wonder of nature?” He kisses your thigh, peppering sweet pecks on your flesh, “This is such a shame, this is an integral part of the entertainment. I will make sure this mistake is thoroughly corrected by the time I am done with you.” He promises with such a deep and melodious voice that you shudder again. “I will show you what true devotion feels like, I will have you see hyperspace in your daze, I will have you trembling and leaking between my hands.” He sounds more and more unhinged and impatient as he speaks. 

You imagine him licking his lips before the complete course meal you represent for him. You brace yourself for what is coming, looking at the ceiling, contemplating your life and how you ended up half-naked on the desk of your Grand Admiral. 

“Let me revel in what you have to offer, my love.” His voice drops another octave, a growling sound resonating in his chest. 

He grips your thighs between his large hands properly to keep them well apart, and you fight the desire to hide yourself again, despite what your conscience screams at you. 

To hide that dirty part of you. 

He blows on your exposed pussy earning a yelp from you, you hear him chuckle before feeling the flat of his tongue against your cunny. You shake terribly with a helpless yap as he starts licking you with enthusiasm, alternating between licks and kisses on your pussy. He trails your slit up and down with the tip of his tongue, titillating your entrance expertly, before rising up to flick your clit. 

By reflex and instinct, again you jerk your hips away, trying to get away, but you feel his large hands gripping your legs and pulling you harshly back towards him and his eager mouth. 

“You will not escape me, my love.” He growls, like a pissed off predator. 

He doesn’t waste any time and dive back in your pussy, and your moans escape you uncontrollably so you press your two hands on your treacherous mouth, silencing yourself. He immediately bites into your thighs. 

“No. You do not get to remain silent under my care.” He growls, “Remove your hands or I will have you screaming.” 

You gulp. Trembling, you remove your hands to grip the edges of the desk, digging your nails into the metal. He kisses you where he bitten you, like a sorry gesture, and dives back in your pussy. He thoroughly laps at you, purring like he is enjoying himself. 

But how could he enjoy himself? You are not touching him in any way, how doing…that could bring him enjoyment?  

Men don’t derive pleasure from touching their women. 

But you hear his purr deepens as he accelerates his ministrations on your pussy. Weird… 

That’s not how it is usually done. 

But here he is, eating you out with enthusiasm and ebullience, sparing no effort to have you moan and mewl under his touch. He himself isn’t shy of his groans, eating you out voraciously, forcing undignified pleas from you, moaning in unisson. 

“Oh Maker, Thrawn!” You let out between two strangled mewls. 

“Yes, Cha’cah. Sing for me, my love. Sing me your pleasure, I want to hear everything!” He slurps greedily, “I feel you getting wetter and wetter, this is exactly what I want, you are doing wonderful.” He praises you. 

He sounds so… Satisfied. With his deep voice, purr, and growl, he looks like he is savoring the present moment. And you. 

You dig your nails in the metal so much they hurt, your hand terribly tensed around the desk. You feel your own slick rolling down your ass and the cold desk, and surely Thrawn’s laps. You hope you are not ruining his pristine uniform… 

Gone is your refined and elegant man, between your legs is an avid animal devouring you like its last meal, you hear him make the most indecent sounds and they go straight to your pussy. 

“You taste divine, Cha’cah,” He exclaims between two long and slow licks, “What you are offering me is a real delight. I wish I had come to you sooner, tasting you is such an enthralling experience.” 

You moan between your closed lips, the back of your hand against your mouth. The pleasure is spreading through every nerve ending by waves, your legs are now shaking irrepressibly and your pussy is gaping around the void, infuriatingly empty. 

“You little moans go straight to my cock, Cha’cah. I am getting so hard just by hearing you, just by tasting you.” He growls hungrily, laving at you with such diligence, “You are relieving me of so much discomfort, this is exactly what I needed today.” 

But how? How pleasuring you could relieve him in any way? A man gets relief under a woman's touch, not the other way around. 

He spreads your folds wide apart with two fingers and takes a big lap at your hidden flesh before focusing on your nervous bud. He takes it in his mouth, sucking on it like a lollipop, making it roll between his lips, flitting his tongue, flicking it swiftly and spreading little shockwaves through your pearl. Your slick is now leaking in abundance, soiling your vulva and Thrawn lips and jaw, but he doesn’t mind in the least, quite contrary. He is owning it like everything he does and actually sees it as proof of your pleasure and the price of all his efforts. 

“Relax, my love. You are so tense under my hands, you should enjoy yourself. This is supposed to be pleasurable for you, too.” 

It is pleasurable for you. Immensely. But that goes against absolutely everything that has been taught to you, and you cannot help but feel dirty for enjoying yourself. 

“I’m trying!” You push the unwilling words out of your throat, “It’s just… I’ve never done that! We don’t… do that here!” 

“That is a shame, my love. I will help you reach higher pleasures, just for you. Just let me work and relax.” 

And he doubles down in his efforts, licking, sucking, lapping, laving, gliding at your little clit getting all puffy and excitable. He purrs deeply as he flickers your bud at high speed, having you a shaking mess, dripping and drooling, helpless under the skillful touch of your man. 

He enters you with his tongue, waving it against your G spot, grazing and brushing it with his tip, tonguefucking you expertly. 

This is so immoral. 

This is so dirty. 

This is so… 

But why? 

Why is he so good at this? Why does it bring you so much pleasure? 

Why? 

“Oh maker…” You whine, “Ple-please slow down… I-I will…” 

“No, my love. Give me a formidable and powerful orgasm.” He encourages you, accelerating his work on your sensitive mound of flesh. 

He stopped being nice and gentle long ago, he is eating you out like a ravenous beast, devouring you like all reason abandoned him.  

What noises coming from him are hardly worthy of a Grand Admiral, but they’re so… Exciting! Teasing that animal part of your brain, making you cream like crazy against his swollen lips, licking you clean avidly. He forces you to chant for his ears, pushing all the most undignified sounds out of your mouth without any regard for your dignity. 

Your formerly gaping pussy is now clenching hard on the void, dripping in abundance, all your nerves on fire, you convulse on the desk under each teasing touch. Your blood flows suddenly south, making your pussy lips and inner muscles puffy and gorging themself with blood, making them soft and fluffy. 

The shockwaves of pleasure getting more and more intense, more and more close, like a hurrying tsunami rolling furiously towards the shore, ready to drown you. You brace yourself for it, but you couldn’t have predicted how hard it hit.  

The tsunami crashes upon you, destroying everything in its wake, overwhelming you under a sea of marvelous sensations, tensing your whole body furiously. The scream of his name escapes you inadvertently, your eyes rolling inside your head. Behind your closed eyelids you see hyperspace lanes glowing brightly among shining stars, like grand fireworks flashing in the clear night sky.  

Thrawn suddenly stands up and pumps his painfully hard cock over you, and cums all over your vulva and venus mount with a groan finishing in a deep, satisfied sigh.  

Your whole body suddenly relaxes, all your muscles at once, with a “oof” so much that the back of your head hits the desk. Your chest rises up and down rapidly to catch your breath as you feel a trickle of sweat on your forehead.  

“Grandiose, Cha’cah.” He says, panting with his deep and dulcet voice, “This. This is giving me what I want.” He praises you, disheveled, his two hands on each side of your waist, looming over you with his gleaming red eyes devouring you. 

You gulp. 

You remain still, eyes closed, registering what the heck just happened here. You try to close your legs back, but only imprison Thrawn’s hips between them. You feel his marge hands caressing your thighs and he leans forward to kiss where your womb would be very respectfully. He peppers kisses very delicately, brushing his nose against the thin skin while purring deeply. 

You gasp for air, still not finding your words, your mind frozen and in a mess after such an orgasm. 

“You came very hard for me, Cha’cah, thank you.” He admires, pushing back your panties over your wet pussy to soak it and take it for himself later, he raises his head back to you with a thin complimentary smile on his swollen lips, “This was a fantastic experience.” 

You realize your mouth is half open and close it, wiping the drool that escaped your mouth all over your jaw. Did he make you lose all your composure just like that? 

You feel so... dirty. 

How could you enjoy yourself like that? 

And how could you cum harder than any other men ever did? At that immoral act? 

Thrawn buttons up his pants and takes out a towel to clean your lower stomach of his seed. 

“Cha’cah? You are eerily silent, is everything alright?” He calls for you. 

You flare your nostrils, chastising yourself. 

You rise in a seating position, almost hitting Thrawn’s jaw with your head, but he takes a step back. 

You raise your head to him with a bright joyfull smile. 

“Everything is great, Grand Admiral! I just promised Konstantine to came back immediately after my rendez-vous.” You explain with glee. 

“Oh.” He simply responds. “Of course, you may go.” 

He seems almost displeased, like he wished for you to remain and cuddle with you. 

But you need to go. 

You need to flee. 

You dress back up, kiss him swiftly on the cheek, and escape from his office with your false smile plastered for everyone to see. 

And you run away. 

@bluechiss @justanothersadperson93 @thrawnspetgoose @twilekchiss @dance-like-russia-isnt-watching@obbicrystaleo@empresskrennic@davesrightshoe @holylonelyponyeatingmacaroni @princesslunamoon19 @Janjtje @helrose8 @sparepartsthrowaway

[romantichopelessly]

invitation to speak more about the secret good td3 in your head, if you so desire!

Ok so I sat on this ask for DAYS because I wanted to have some cohesive, great answer, but the thing about The Dreamer Trilogy that haunts me is that I can never come up with good concrete thoughts about how to fix the issues I have with it, which is why I reference the “secret good td3 in my head” because it can never fully leave my head in any real way. That being said here’s a list of some elements I would change to make my secret good td3, in no particular order.

The visionaries don’t exist. Liliana, Persifal, etc. are just psychics that keep getting visions of the end, and die for reasons other than their power. Explaining what Visionaries are and subsequently over explaining the magic system of td3 is part of what made the trilogy so confusing and ruined a lot of the magic that the TRC universe already had for me. We don’t need concrete explanations, and psychics can still fill this role. The changing age and exploding added nothing?? to the narrative?? that I can think of?? We can even keep the age gap for Carliana if we want to, just make Liliana an older psychic like Maura/Persephone/Calla. It will even add to the excellent Carmen-Mr. Gray parallels.

Lean more into the themes of the age group. TRC is a coming of age story. It’s about being 17/18. It’s about learning your inner self and getting others to see the true you. TD3 should be more about being 19/20/21. To me, TD3 at its peak is like Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 6. Which is uniquely about the horror of being in your early 20s, losing support systems, having to learn to be a full self-reliant person, grappling with what your parents did to you, and the crushing loneliness of not being around Your People anymore. TD3 has all of these themes, but I really think they need to be fleshed out more, and given proper conclusion that isn’t just “yippee everything is fine now!”

Greywaren is longer. I think almost everyone agrees that Greywaren, as a book was just too short to wrap up all the plot lines set up, and does almost none of them justice. That book needed a whole rewrite. In theory, I’m completely fine with how it opens—Ronan being in a dream coma was foreshadowed from CDTH, and is an idea that I’d actually thought of as interesting before even reading the book. Other elements of this book like Declan’s rampage, Matthew going rogue, etc are great directions for the characters, I’d just want to rework them. I could make solo posts about any of these.

The Pynch breakup either doesn’t happen, or is set up further in advance and lasts longer. Personally, I lean towards the latter. Adam and Ronan’s conflict is set up from the very beginning of CDTH, or even from Opal (Adam warring between wanting to stay with Ronan and needing to follow through with his lifelong plans, and being frustrated that Ronan never asks for anything from Adam (specifically, to stay) ((side note: perhaps Adam’s insecurity here about Ronan respecting his boundaries so thoroughly stems from both having a family that never would respect his wishes, and Gansey (Adam’s model of love, Adam’s model of everything) having to learn not to ask things like that of Adam. What does it mean that Ronan never even tries?)) AND Ronan dealing with the crushing loneliness of being left and dealing with the consequences of having a long distance bf who is more successful than him). So they needed to have an argument about this. It’s also just in character that these two would not be perfect communicators. So. My idea: In CDTH we get no Adam POVs, just Ronan’s side of the story. We see, rather than Ronan just getting upset over one missed text, that Adam begins to pull away after the murder crab incident. We the audience don’t know why, other than Ronan’s unreliable narration and insecurity. So when Adam doesn’t respond to that one text at a vital fraught time, Ronan does what he does best, shuts down, pulls away and self destructs. Then MI rolls around and we start getting Adam POVs. We learn that after the murder crabs, Adam was throwing himself into trying to fix the nightwash situation for Ronan (Adam is not in contact with Declan here, unfortunately). After visiting for Ronan’s birthday and seeing the Lace, Adam starts to have dreams/premonitions about the end of the world (no visionaries in this universe, just psychics who are/were close to dreamers getting the visions!!). So he obviously sets out to fix this alone too. He calls his best approximations to contacts in this underground world that aren’t Declan. Henry and Mr. Gray. (+ maybe also Maura & Calla) ((Also don’t worry Henry doesn’t leave the Sarchengsey trip, just advises Adam on where to start)). Now that Adam has lost contact with Ronan (he was busy and missed the message and Ronan went off the grid like in canon), he goes full throttle into trying to solve everything while managing being his perfect Harvard persona (this gets him close to a breakdown, very reminiscent to Dream Thieves). Perhaps we get to see Adam and Declan working together to acquire sweet metals and understand the underworld of magic together. He and Ronan fight the one time they get to talk over the phone, Adam because he is truly scared Ronan will be the one to end the world, Ronan because he feels like this is another person perceiving him as a failure and wanting to control/baby him (+ he hates Adam hanging with Mr Gray and Declan of all people). By the time Greywaren starts, Adam is wrung out and hurting and Ronan is dead to the world, so yeah. He doesn’t think he can spend emotional energy playing safeguard to his boyfriend’s coma corpse. And then by the end of the book they have an actual argument/discussion no “they didn’t need words” cop out.

The number of Dreamers/Dreams has to be reduced. It’s cool to say that dreams were always integrated into this world, but it creates so many plot holes it isn’t even funny. There is no way Niall could have passed off the Greywaren being a box that brings dreams to life if Dreamers were such a common occurrence. No secret can be kept that well, someone in the black market would have known, and thus Greenmantle/Mr. Gray/Laumonier/ect WOULD HAVE KNOWN !!!

Declan does not have all his character erased by suddenly loving his mommy and daddy. Seriously what the fuck was that. Declan suddenly deciding to forgive his father because actually Declan was secretly the favorite child first is INSANE. Especially after seeing that that changed because Niall and Mor WANTED TO KILL HIS BROTHER!!! The two tenants of Declan Lynch in TRC were protecting his remaining family and fucking hating that Ronan idolized Niall just because Niall loved him best. So why make Declan turn around and do the same??? Suddenly Niall wasn’t so bad because actually he let Declan be shoved into a car trunk during a shootout out of love. I hate this plot line. Family doesn’t have to be forgiven. Understood, that’s one thing. Forgiven?? Not always. Sick of it. The real takeaway from seeing those memories should have been closure to Declan’s arc of learning that dreams should be viewed as people completely.

I definitely have other points but I cannot think of them right now. And I want to post this so I will. But TD3, as you can see, makes me an insane person.

[snowysosturn]

Fire & Desire - Matt Sturniolo Part 11

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6 Part 7 Part 8 Part 9 Part 10 Part 11 Part 12 Part 13 Part 14 Part 15 Part 16 Part 17 Part 18 Part 19 Part 20 Part 21 Part 22 Part 23 Part 24 Part 25 Part 26 Part 27 Part 28 Part 29 Finale

Pairing: Y/n x Matt Sturniolo

Summary: Y/n has always clashed with Matt. Despite working for Chris’s clothing brand and being close with Nick, her relationship with Matt has always been tense at best. While being forced to be around each other more, their animosity turns into something deeper. Can they overcome their differences, or will their fiery emotions tear them apart?

Warnings: angst, tension, arguements, mentions of alcohol, being intoxicated

Matt’s gaze locks onto the envelope in my hand, his jaw tightening. “Oh, this again” he mutters, dropping his phone onto the bed. He leans back against the headboard, crossing his arms over his chest like he’s gearing up for a fight.

“I didn’t realize this was your jumper” I say quickly, gesturing to the yellow Ralph Lauren sweater I’m wearing. “Nick gave it to me yesterday. I didn’t know-”

“Convenient” he says, his lips curving into a bitter smirk. “Nick’s just handing out my stuff now, huh? Real generous of him. Not that it matters. Keep it.”

“Are you done?” I snap, holding up the envelope in my hand. “Because this is what I’m here to talk about.”

Matt’s smirk fades. He shifted himself up, his arms still crossed. “What about it? You’re upset I didn’t send it with chocolates or something?”

I glare at him. “You sent me flowers. Then threw them in the trash. And this-” I wave the card slightly. “This apology? I don’t get it, Matt. Why would you even do that? What’s the point if you’re not going to own it?”

He looks away, jaw tight, as though he’s trying to figure out how to answer. After a long pause, he finally speaks. “I don’t know. Maybe I shouldn’t have bothered.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have” I say sharply, before I can stop myself. “Because now I’m here, and you clearly don’t want to explain yourself.”

“You’re right” he says, his voice colder now. “I shouldn’t have sent them. It was a mistake. I should’ve just let Nate get you flowers instead. That’s his job anyway.”

I freeze, staring at him. “What?”

“You heard me” he says, his tone bitter now. “If anyone should be sending you flowers, it’s Nate. Not me. But let me save you some trouble, he runs through girls like it’s a sport. You’re just a number to him, Y/n. That’s all you’d ever be.”

The words made no sense to me, knowing that there was nothing going on between me and Nate. But I know he’s trying to get under my skin, and that just makes me angrier.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about first of all” I say, my voice shaking slightly. “And even if that was true, why do you care? You’re acting like this is about Nate, but it’s not, is it?”

Matt doesn’t respond immediately. He just looks at me, his eyes flickering with something I can’t quite place, frustration, maybe. Or something deeper.

“I don’t care” he says finally, but the way he says it is unconvincing, like he’s trying to convince himself more than me.

“Right” I mutter, taking a step back. “Well, if you don’t care, then stop acting like this. Stop sending flowers and writing cards and then throwing them away. And stop dragging Nate into it like this is about him, because it’s not.” 

The room remained silent as I let out a frustrated sigh, “I don’t know what’s going on with you, Matt, or what I ever did to make you hate me so much, but I don’t want it to ruin Hawaii. Nick and Chris did something really thoughtful by inviting me, and I don’t want it to be awkward between us while we’re there.”

He exhales sharply, looking away. “Yeah, well, maybe you should’ve thought about that before busting in here and accusing me of playing games.”

I clench my jaw, trying to keep calm. “I didn’t accuse you of anything. I’m asking you to stop.. whatever this is. If you don’t care, fine. But don’t drag Nate into it, and don’t make me feel like some kind of idiot for trying to understand.”

His gaze softens slightly, and for a moment, I think he might actually say something that makes sense. But instead, he shrugs, his expression hardening again. “Fine. I’ll back off. Happy?”

I study him for a moment, trying to figure out what’s really going on behind that mask he always wears. But I don’t have the energy to keep pushing, so I just shake my head and turn to leave. I step out of his room, closing the door behind me, shutting it with more force than I intended.

I head straight to my room, practically flying up the stairs. My chest feels tight, my thoughts racing in every direction. That conversation with Matt was supposed to give me clarity, but instead, it’s only made everything worse. Why does he have to be so infuriating? Why does he have to say things that don’t make sense, like some cryptic puzzle he’s tempting me to solve?

I throw myself on top of my bed, burying my face in my pillow as all of my feelings boil to the surface, and before I know it, tears start falling. I don’t even try to stop them. I let them flow, hoping they’ll wash away some of the tension clawing at my chest. The tears aren’t just for Matt and his mixed signals, they’re for everything. For how lost I feel, for the way nothing goes right or feels straightforward anymore.

My mind replays the conversation over and over, dissecting every word, every glance, every pause. Why did he say it should’ve been Nate who gave me the flowers? Why did he warn me about Nate like that? And why did he throw the flowers away in the first place? None of it makes sense, and it’s driving me insane. I wipe at my cheeks, but the tears keep coming, hot and relentless.

Part of me wishes I could just forget the whole thing, shove it into a mental box, lock it away, and never think about it again. But another part of me knows I won’t. Not when Matt has this way of getting under my skin, and especially when we're going to spend every waking minute with each other for the next few weeks. Hawaii was supposed to be a break, an escape. But now, I can’t help but feel like it’s going to be anything but relaxing if things with Matt keep going like this. 

The next morning, I wake up feeling groggy and emotionally drained. My eyes are puffy from crying, and the frustration of yesterday’s conversation still lingers throughout my body. I take a deep breath and remind myself to focus on the day ahead, before starting to get ready. There’s no time to dwell on Matt or his cryptic actions.

Nick is already up and at it when I make my way downstairs. He’s sitting at the kitchen table, typing furiously on his laptop, a cup of coffee in one hand. He looks up when he hears me enter, flashing his usual enthusiastic grin.

“There she issss!” he says, closing the laptop dramatically. “You ready for a day of last minute prep?”

I give him a half smile and nod. “Yeah what do you need to do?”

Nick looks at me for a moment, his eyes narrowing like he’s trying to figure out if something’s wrong. But to my relief, he doesn’t press.

“Okay, so first things first, we’re getting your nails done. Non negotiable. If we’re going to Hawaii, you need to have vacation ready nails.”

“Nick, my nails are fine” I protest, holding up my hands.

He raises an eyebrow. “No offense, but ‘fine’ isn’t good enough. You’re coming with me, and we’re going all out.”

I rolled my eyes but let him drag me out the door. Honestly, a little pampering doesn’t sound so bad right now.

The day flew by as we rushed through last minute preparations. Nick and I spent the morning at the nail salon, where I settled with a classic french tip. Afterward, we hit a few shops to grab more shorts for Nick. Back at home, I double checked my suitcase, making sure I had everything I’d need for the trip, though my mind wandered more than I’d like to admit.

By the evening, I felt physically tired but mentally restless. I tried to focus on the excitement of Hawaii and the break I desperately needed, but thoughts of yesterday’s conversation with Matt kept creeping in. I forced myself to push it to the side and take myself to bed. We had an early flight the next day, so I set my alarm before climbing in. As I lay there, staring at the ceiling, I made a silent promise to myself. This trip would be about relaxing, having fun, and leaving all the confusion and tension back at home, even if it wasn’t exactly easy to do.

My alarm went off at 5 am, dragging me out of a light, restless sleep. I groaned, hitting snooze once before forcing myself to get up. I could hear quiet movement around the house already, doors creaking, the sound of someone wheeling suitcases, and the bang of cups in the kitchen. I quickly got dressed, grabbed my suitcase, and made my way to the living area.

Nick was already there, suitcase next to him. “Ready for paradise?” he asked with a sleepy grin.

I nodded. "As ready as I’ll ever be."

Chris and Nate came up a moment later, both looking slightly disheveled but ready to help. Chris grabbed Nick’s suitcase while Nate reached for mine. I thanked him quietly, and he just nodded.

The silence was heavy, but oddly enough, it was comforting. The silence just wasn’t between Matt and I now, it seemed like everyone was too tired to make conversation this early, which made it less obvious that Matt and I hadn’t said a word to each other.

I glanced over and saw Matt standing near the door, his phone in his hand as he scrolled through it. He looked up briefly when Nate passed by him with my suitcase, but he didn’t say anything before following them down.The three of them loaded everything into the car while Nick and I lingered inside, waiting for the signal to head out. 

Matt took responsibility of driving all of us to the airport. The drive was quiet, not that there would be much conversation out of five people in the early hours of the morning. We arrived at LAX just as the sky began to lighten. After paying for long stay parking, we unloaded the suitcases from the trunk. Everyone grabbed their bags, and we walked toward the departures section, the chill of the early morning air still lingering.

The airport was busy, but not chaotic, the flow of people moving fast. We made our way to the American Airlines desk, where a sign displayed our flight to Kahului. “There it is” Nick said, pointing ahead as he led the way.

We joined the line to check in and offload our bags. Nate and Chris joked quietly ahead of us, their energy picking up as we got closer to the counter. I couldn’t help but take a glimpse at Matt, who was standing slightly apart, looking at his phone. The awkwardness between us lingered, but thankfully, the chaos of the airport didn’t make it obvious.

When it was finally our turn, we handed over our passports and tickets. The airline agent smiled and tagged our bags before sending them down the conveyor belt. “Enjoy your trip!” she said cheerfully, handing us back our boarding passes and passports.

“Thanks!” Nick replied, grinning. “We plan to.”

With our bags checked in and our hands free, we regrouped in a free area away from the check in desks. The trip was officially underway, and for the first time since waking up, I felt a small buzz of excitement. Hawaii was actually happening.

After getting through the long security line, we gathered our belongings and headed toward the food court. It was close to 6.30am now, and my stomach was screaming at me. I needed food and I needed it quick. We ended up at a cafe, where everyone ordered breakfast before finding a table to sit at while we ate.

Nick sipped his iced coffee, clearly wide awake now, and leaned back in his chair. “Alright” he said, “So what seats is everyone in on the plane? I wanna know who I have to sit next to for six hours.”

Chris pulled out his boarding pass first, looking over it. “I’m in 27A” he said.

“I’m 27B” Nate chimed in, smirking.

“27C” Nick added with a grin. “Perfect, we’re all together.”

I took a sip of my coffee, nearly choking on it as I glanced down at my boarding pass. “I’m in 22E. I’m not even in the same row as yous.”

Matt pulled out his pass, frowning slightly before reading it aloud. “22D.”

I froze for a second, my stomach flipping. Of course. Of course, out of everyone, I’d end up sitting next to Matt.

Nate burst out laughing. “Oh man, you two are gonna have such a fun time crammed next to each other for the whole flight.”

I glared at him, but he just smirked and took an obnoxiously loud sip of his drink.

“It’s fine” I said, more to convince myself than anyone else. “It’s just a flight. We’ll survive.”

Matt shrugged, slipping his boarding pass back into his passport. “Whatever. As long as you don’t steal the armrest.”

The tension was obvious, but no one said anything else about it. We finished eating, the mood shifting back to excitement about the trip. But I couldn’t shake the swirling feeling in my stomach. Six hours next to Matt sounded like the longest flight of my life.

It was nearly time to board so we made our way toward the terminal, following the signs for our gate. Our flight was due to take off at 9am, so we had time to get there. When they called our group to board, we lined up, handed over our boarding passes, and shuffled down the bridge toward the plane. I could feel my nerves creeping in as we got closer to our seats. I was a nervous flier anyway, but now the seating situation made the nerves feel worse. Matt walked ahead of me, casually scanning the seat numbers as if he wasn’t dreading this as much as I was.

Finally, we reached our row, 22D and 22E. Matt slid into the aisle seat without a word, and I plopped down next to him, setting my bag under the seat in front of me. I hated the middle seat.

I took a deep breath, glancing around as people continued boarding. The guys were a few rows behind us, already joking loudly about something. God how I wish I was one of them.

I leaned back into the seat, already planning to just sleep this entire flight. If Matt and I weren’t going to talk, and let’s be honest, we weren’t, then maybe I’d at least get some rest. The flight attendants made their announcements, and soon we were in the air.

Once the seatbelt sign turned off, curiosity got the better of me and I leaned forward to sift through the entertainment options on the little screen in front of me. Scrolling through the endless movie titles, I couldn’t find anything that caught my attention.

Beside me, Matt sighed, his screen already on. 

I glanced over just in time to see him click on 10 Things I Hate About You. For a second, I was surprised, out of all the movies, this was the one he picked?

“You like that movie?” I asked before I could stop myself.

He turned his head slightly, raising an eyebrow. “Who doesn’t? It’s a classic.”

I smiled, unable to help it. “Fair point.”

He settled back into his seat, his arms crossing loosely over his chest as the opening credits started rolling. I found myself sneaking glances at the screen, my own selection forgotten.

“You’re just gonna watch mine, aren’t you?” he teased, catching me mid glance.

“Maybe..” I shot back, smirking. “It’s a good movie.”

For the first time, Matt giggled, a real, genuine laugh at something I said. “Fine, but don’t hog my screen.”

We ended up sharing the movie in a way I hadn’t expected, making quiet comments about our favorite scenes and quoting the lines we both knew by heart. I felt weird.. it felt... easy, like the tension between us didn’t exist.

When the scene with the marching band playing on the bleachers came up, I felt my lips moving before I even realized it.

"You're just too good to be true, can't take my eyes off of youuuu"

To my surprise, Matt’s voice joined mine, quietly singing the line in unison. We both stopped, catching each other mid verse, and immediately burst into laughter.

"Seriously?" I said, grinning.

“What?” Matt replied, smirking. “You’re the one who started it.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t expect you to sing along” I shot back, shaking my head.

As the movie went on, it only got worse.. or better, depending on how you looked at it. It felt strange, but in a good way, like we were finally on the same wavelength, even if it was just over a movie. By the time the poem scene rolled around, Matt tilted his head toward me.

“Bet you’re one of those people who cries during this part” he teased.

I raised an eyebrow. “Bet you are too.”

He didn’t deny it, just smirked and went back to watching.

By the end of the movie, we were both smiling, the tension replaced by a shared sense of ease. It was probably the first time we’d genuinely laughed together without any sarcasm or snark.

Soon after, the flight attendants started coming down the aisle with the food cart, Matt stirred slightly, rubbing his eyes and sitting up straighter.

"You getting something?" I asked, glancing over at him.

"Yeah" he muttered, squinting as if even the dim cabin lights were too bright. "But I swear, I can't even keep my eyes open right now."

"Then why are you bothering?" I teased, but when he shot me a half hearted glare, I rolled my eyes. "Fine. Just give it here when it comes. I'll keep it on my tray until you're ready for it."

His expression softened into something that almost resembled gratitude. "Thanks" he mumbled.

When the food finally arrived, he lazily reached for his tray table but paused, blinking sluggishly.

"Don't bother" I said, pulling his tray of food over to mine. "I got it."

"Yeah, yeah, you're a saint" he grumbled, but there was the faintest smirk tugging at his lips before he leaned back in his seat.

Matt tilted his head against the small headrest attached to his seat and shut his eyes, clearly giving in to his exhaustion. I felt more awake than anything now so I decided to sift through the in flight entertainment menu again, settling on another rom com to pass the time.

Not long after, I felt a shift in the weight beside me. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed Matt's head drop forward before it slowly tilted to the side, right onto my shoulder.

I froze for a second, unsure of what to do. His face was relaxed, his breathing slow, completely unaware of the situation.

I thought about waking him, but.. he looked peaceful. And, honestly, I didn’t mind.

With a small sigh, I adjusted slightly to make it more comfortable for both of us and went back to watching my movie.

By the time I finished my second movie, his head was still resting on my shoulder, and I couldn’t help but smile a little. For someone who could be so infuriating, moments like these reminded me that maybe there was more to Matt than he let on.

The captain's voice crackled through the intercom, announcing our descent into Kahului, Matt woke beside me. He blinked slowly, rubbing his face with one hand, and then turned to look at me.

His gaze dropped to where my shoulder was, and his brows furrowed slightly. “Wait.. was I.. was I asleep on you the whole time?”

I tried to keep my expression neutral, but the corner of my mouth twitched in amusement. “Yep. Dead to the world. Snoring and everything.”

His eyes widened slightly, and I could see a faint hint of color rise to his cheeks. “I don’t snore.”

I raised an eyebrow. “Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night. Literally.”

He let out a soft groan, running a hand through his hair as he leaned back in his seat. “Well.. uh, thanks for not shoving me off, I guess.”

I shrugged casually. “Figured you needed the sleep. Plus, you didn’t drool all over me, so I let it slide.”

That comment earned me a small laugh, though he still looked a bit awkward. He glanced out the window on our side, clearly trying to play it cool, but the way he kept fidgeting with his seatbelt betrayed him.

Not too long after, we landed and began to disembark the plane, into the warm Maui air, the energy buzzing between all of us even though we were still shaking off the stiffness from the flight. After collecting our bags, we stood near the exit where our transfer driver was holding a sign with Nick’s name on it.

The drive to the villa was surreal, with palm trees lining the roads and the scent of salt water from ocean wafting through the open windows. Nate and Chris were hyper, pointing out every little thing as if they’d never been here before. Nick was quieter, scrolling through his phone, and Matt sat silently in the back, his sunglasses shielding his expression.

It was 2pm Hawaii time when we finally arrived at the villa, and the place looked like it was something out of a movie, white walls, large windows, and a gorgeous pool overlooking the ocean. Five bedrooms, one for each of us.

“All right” Nick declared, dropping his suitcase in the entryway. “First come, first serve. Claim your rooms!”

Chris bolted upstairs with Nate right behind him, their voices echoing through the house as they bickered over who got the room with the best view. Nick wandered off down the hall, humming to himself as he inspected the options. That left me and Matt still standing near the doorway.

“You’re not gonna fight for the best room?” he asked, glancing at me with a smirk.

I shrugged, rolling my suitcase forward. “Nah, I’ll just take whatever’s left. As long as there’s a bed, I’m good.”

“Suit yourself” he said, grabbing his own bag and heading upstairs.

Once everyone had claimed their spots, I found myself left with a room on the far end of the villa, tucked away from everyone else. It was smaller than the others, but it had an ensuite and a private balcony with a view of the ocean, so I wasn’t complaining. Honestly, the distance from the chaos of being with boys was kind of a bonus. I knew I’d want some peace and quiet at some point. I let the reality of being here sink in. It felt like a fresh start, and the dynamics between everyone were already proving to be.. interesting.

By the time I had unpacked, showered, and finally settled into my room, the exhaustion from the early morning and long flight floored me. I decided to lie down for just a moment, but the comfort of the bed dragged me into a deep nap.

When I woke up, the time on my phone read 5pm, and the sounds of loud, off key singing drifted through the villa. Disorientated but curious, I got up and made my way downstairs into the main foyer.

The sight that greeted me was something straight out of a comedy. Chris, Nate, and Matt were standing in a loose huddle, arms slung over each other’s shoulders, belting out some song at the top of their lungs. Their words were slurred, their movements uncoordinated, and the sight in front of me was nothing short of chaotic.

Nick stood off to the side, arms crossed and wearing an expression of sheer disbelief. His eyes flicked to me as I entered, and I raised an eyebrow at him.

“What the hell happened while I was asleep?” I asked, pointing toward the impromptu concert happening in the middle of the villa.

Nick sighed, rubbing a hand over his face like he couldn’t believe it either. “Well, they decided to go for a walk to ‘explore the area’” he said, air quoting the last part. “Somehow, that walk turned into them stumbling into a few bars. Fast forward a couple of hours, and this is what we’ve got. They’re completely pissed.”

I glanced back at the trio, who were now attempting to harmonize but failing miserably. Chris had climbed onto one of the couches, using a long decorative pillow as a makeshift microphone, while Matt leaned against the back of a chair, swaying slightly. Nate, the ringleader of this circus, was conducting them like an offbeat orchestra.

“And dinner’s in, what, two hours?” I asked Nick, already knowing the answer.

“Yep” he said flatly. “No way they’re sobering up in time.”

I groaned, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Great. So now what? Do we just let them embarrass us in public, or do we try to get them somewhat presentable?”

Nick shrugged. “Honestly, at this point, I’m tempted to just let them crash and burn. They brought this on themselves.”

I glanced back at the drunken trio, my frustration tainted with the faintest hint of amusement. As ridiculous as they were, it was hard not to laugh at the scene. Still, this wasn’t exactly the way I envisioned the first night of the trip going.

“More importantly, what are you planning on wearing tonight?” he asked, trying to ignore the drunken escapade happening in front of us.

“I was thinking my green crochet two piece, you know the  halter top and shorts” I said.

Nick nodded approvingly. “That's a nice first night outfit. I still need to figure mine out, so I’m going to do that now.”

Just as we were about to separate and retreat to our rooms, Matt, swaying but still coordinated enough to grab my arm, pulled me toward the three of them.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he slurred, a mischievous grin spreading across his face. “You’re part of this now.”

Before I could protest, he dragged me into their little circle. Nate and Chris immediately followed his lead, throwing their arms around both of us to complete the huddle.

“Y/N! Y/N! Y/N!” they all started chanting in unison, their voices loud and slurred but surprisingly synchronized.

I couldn’t help it, the absurdity of it all made me laugh, the kind of genuine laugh that comes out before you can even think about holding it back. They all looked so ridiculous, swaying and cheering like they were at some sporting event instead of just drunk in the middle of a villa.

“Okay, okay!” I said between laughs, holding up my hands in mock surrender. “You win! But if you’re not at least halfway sober by the time we leave for dinner, don’t expect me to sit anywhere near you!”

They all laughed too, Nate patting my shoulder like I’d just joined some exclusive club.

I stepped back from the chaotic huddle, still smiling as I shook my head. “Alright, that’s enough bonding for now. I’m going to head up and start getting ready” I said, brushing a strand of hair out of my face.

As I turned to leave, Matt called after me. “Wait!” He stumbled forward a step, catching his balance against the wall before straightening up. “I’ll bring you a drink to your room. You can’t start getting ready without a little buzz. It’s, like.. a vacation rule or something.”

I gave him a skeptical look, though I couldn’t help the smirk creeping onto my lips. “Matt, I don’t need you enabling my alcohol consumption. I can manage that all on my own, thanks.”

He smirked back, raising a finger in the air as if he’d just come up with a brilliant idea. “Nope. You’re part of the group now. And the group drinks together. I’ll bring you something good.. you won’t even taste the alcohol.”

“Somehow, that makes me even more nervous” I shot back, but I didn’t fight him on it. “But fine. Just don’t spill it on the way up, alright?”

Matt chuckled, placing a hand on his chest in mock seriousness. “I would never dishonor a drink like that.”

Shaking my head, I turned and made my way up the stairs, already mentally planning out how I’d do my makeup. If Matt was serious about bringing me a drink, maybe a little buzz wouldn’t be the worst thing while I got ready. After all, if I was going to spend the evening immersed in this group of chaos, I might as well have a head start.

a/n: things are.. changing...???

taglist : @mattybearnard @sturn-33 @ncm9696 @yourfavsturniologirl @crazy4jewel @sodakid1234 @stupendoustreewinner @lovealwayssturniolos @matthewsturniolosss @m4ttsmunch @loveexxx @ilusa @starkeyszn @wonnieeluvvr @dylnblue @valxrieq @maggot3647 @cigarettecemetary @ribread03 @chrisstvrns @bandasaruswrx @noplaceissafeanymore @amexiass @witchofthehour @mattssgf @jetaimevous @v33angel  @ivysturnss @urmom69lol @ashlishes @watercolorskyy @sturnioloshottiekay @amelia-sturniolo3 @imjusthereforthesturniolosmut @pvssychicken @alizestvrnss @chrisstxrnsaxe @sophand4n4 @vickytaa @marrykisskilled @bxtchboy69 @yourfavsturniologirl @julisturn @sydneyylainn @sophia-77n @trevorsgodmother @sturnslutz @yourmother29 @girl24cherry @astronea @pinkdyit

[lonelymikoto]

I had some headcanons for Kakashi Hatake a while ago. Was scared of the amount I had to translate from russian to english to post here, but thank goodness I tried an AI yesterday and it helped me a lot. Thanks, DeepSeek 🫶🐋

Well then, let's go. I think I'll start now and really get into it... Apologies in advance...

Attention! These headcanons are created for contemplation and entertainment purposes and do not claim to represent the true state of affairs in the canonical work.

(Also, there's a lot of text, be prepared)

1. I think my very first headcanon about him is that when Kakashi eats, he doesn't have enough time to chew while keeping his mask on. He needs to seize any moment when no one's looking to stuff his cheeks and sit there chewing like a hamster, so seeing him with full cheeks is quite a common sight.

2. Since he had to live without parents from a young age while already being a genin, if not a chunin, he learned many survival and household skills. For example: fishing, hunting, cooking, repairs, and cleaning. Though in adulthood he might not do these things himself anymore, it's better to save money and do it yourself if you know how.

3. When it comes to alcohol, he prefers sake. For some reason I associate him with sake.

4. Doesn't have a habit of drinking alone. Usually drinks with someone familiar, but even then doesn't cross the line in terms of quantity.

5. Finds every female body attractive in its own way, whether it's a slim model-type, a modest plump girl, or a muscular strong woman. Any type could turn him on.

6. Reads Jiraiya's books as a defense mechanism against depression. He realizes these kinds of books can stimulate dopamine production for obvious reasons and uses this to avoid completely giving up on life like his father did.

7. Initially felt angry at his father after his death and didn't understand why he did it, but with time came to realize many things and forgave him, understanding how he must have felt.

8. If he ever shows his face to someone and they tell him he's actually handsome, he'd blush so hard he'd put the mask back on. It's too sensitive a topic for him since almost no one has seen his face.

9. Sometimes when embarrassed he might cover his face with his hands, despite only one eye (or two in the postwar period) being visible.

10. Prefers salty over sweet or spicy flavors.

11. While cooking alone at home, sometimes dances to music in his head.

12. Occasionally too lazy to shower after training and goes straight to bed, only to realize he now needs to wash the sheets too.

13. His scent: a mix of metallic smell, rain, and green tea.

14. Actually very observant of people and knows when to joke and when to offer support, making him always pleasant to be friends with.

15. In dangerous situations, always thinks first about how to protect his comrades, which can also become his weakness in battle if he's not careful enough.

16. Sometimes summons Pakkun just to cuddle.

17. Though he appears closed off, he actually really wants to find someone he could hug and lie in the grass with whenever convenient.

18. Has a fast metabolism because he eats too quickly. This allows him to eat much more than necessary when he wants to, but he rarely abuses this as he's not particularly attached to food.

19. Weak spots - his calves. That's why he wraps them. His calves are slightly more sensitive, so a hit to the shin might temporarily stun him, but when wrapped it's much more bearable.

20. Meanwhile, his erogenous zones: his ears and sides.

[atinymekanie]

The Night We Met - Chapter 9: One Hunter to Another

|| Premise: What if Dawnbreaker's wish for one day and one night with the woman who lives only in his dreams... came true? ||

| Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11 | Chapter 12 | Chapter 13 | Chapter 14 | Chapter 15 | Chapter 16 | Chapter 17 | Chapter 18 | Chapter 19 | Chapter 20 | Chapter 21 | Chapter 22 |

The afternoon sun slanted down as Zayne walked beside the woman, his coat pockets stuffed full of plushies once more, the little cat plushie sticking its head out of one of them. Had this been any other day or any other place, he might have felt self-conscious about that, but he barely even noticed it. All of his attention was focused on her, his thoughts still a jumble after what had happened at the botanical garden’s café. Before he could speak, she broke the silence that had settled between them.

“Is what happened in the café—” The woman paused for a moment, trying to find the right words before continuing. “Is that something that happens to you…often?” Wincing inwardly, she realized that her question might be prying a bit too much. Still, she couldn’t pass up the chance to find out more about this Zayne. “I’m sorry, I just wondered, because… I know you said you hunt things, where you’re from. Does it ever cause problems when…hunting?” She glanced over at him, trying to get a read on how he was feeling. Such a problem rarely bothered a doctor, but a hunter… That would be a different story. Her fingers tightened subconsciously in the material of his sleeve, where her hand was tucked in his arm as they walked.

“No. No, that’s… That’s never happened to me before,” he replied quietly. Zayne looked over at her as he answered, only to realize she was looking up at him. He met her gaze briefly before looking away again. Why had that happened? Shaking his head, he pondered how to continue, hesitant to bring up anything related to what exactly it was that he hunted. He shuddered inwardly at the thought of how she might look at him if she knew what he did at night. What he hunted. Whom he hunted. “Thankfully, I’ve never encountered that while hunting.”

“Ahh, well, that’s good.” She paused for a moment, thinking. Odd, that he hadn’t experienced this until now. After a moment, she continued, trying to change the subject a little. “ Speaking of hunting, you hunt Wanderers too? Like me, right?” she asked, her voice lilting inquisitively. “I know a little about the nightmares he has – but not a lot. I know there are… things he won’t talk about.”

Zayne’s heart sank, the muscles in his jaw tightening at her question. Not that. Ask anything but that. A feeling like ice water pouring down the back of his shirt spread over him, freezing him in place for an instant. He tried to keep going, to keep walking, praying she hadn’t noticed the pause in his steps, his mind spinning as he tried to find a way to answer her question that wasn’t a lie. As much as he didn’t want her to know about that shameful part of his life, he also didn’t want to lie to her.

When she stopped walking, Zayne knew he had failed. Shit. He felt her tug at his sleeve, stopping him in his tracks. With much the same feeling as that of a man being led to the gallows, he turned to face her, his gaze drawn inexorably up towards hers. Would she condemn him if she found out? If she knew the amount of blood he had spilled? The lives taken? Blood rushed in his ears, the sound of his own heartbeat drowning out that of the vehicles passing on the road behind him. He swallowed thickly, his throat suddenly dry as his eyes met hers, the innocently curious look in them shooting straight through his defenses.

“Not… Not exactly. They are, but…” The words left his lips before he could stop them, tumbling out of him in a rush. Fuck. He had come to realize that he couldn’t lie to her. Even if it meant she came to hate him? Apparently, not even then. Zayne squeezed his eyes shut, trying to avoid her inquisitive gaze, panic flooding through his veins in a frigid deluge. “They don’t start…that way. They…” Zayne took a step back from her, unconsciously retreating from the conversation, his balance wavering as his left foot suddenly wasn’t fully supported any longer, the curb below it dipping to meet the road.

“Zayne!” He heard his name leave her lips short and clipped, worry present in her tone. In his haste to distance himself and his traitorous mouth, he hadn’t realized how close he was to the road behind him. Zayne’s eyes snapped open as he felt her hand yank on his arm, tugging him toward her. He raised his hands as the direction of his momentum changed, suddenly reversing.

Before he knew it, he had steadied himself by placing both of his hands on her shoulders, his face just a few inches from hers. Oh. This close to her, he could see the texture of her lips, the different flecks of color in her irises, and the very clear line of worry on her brow. The worry that he had put there. Annoyance at himself slid through him, crawling into his chest and setting up shop there.

Stepping back and planting her feet, the woman allowed Zayne to catch his balance, feeling the weight of his hands on her shoulders as he did so. Her gaze never left him, her curiosity turned to concern as she had watched him almost step into traffic, his face suddenly panicked. What had caused him to react that way? Without saying anything, she then lifted her hands to his and gently removed them from her shoulders, stepping over to a bench nearby and pulling him down to sit beside her.

Zayne felt himself be pulled over to the bench, following her without question and plopping down onto it robotically. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Had he really almost fallen into traffic while trying to avoid a conversation? True, it was a conversation that could have ended with her staring at him in horror and leaving him alone in a city he didn’t fully know. But still. Being a klutz was not a good look. Nor was being a liar. There seemed to be no winning this. His brain finally pulled itself into some semblance of order at the sound of her voice.

“I’m sorry, Zayne. I didn’t mean to pry,” she murmured gently, her tone apologetic. She kept his hands in hers as she spoke. Part of her had known it might not be a good idea to ask for more information about him, about the nightmare he seemed to live in. But after what had happened in the café, she couldn’t stop herself from being curious. “If you find it hard to tell me, then… I understand. But please know that…that whatever it is you hunt…” She squeezed his hands reassuringly before continuing. “It doesn’t matter, as long as you’re protecting those who can’t protect themselves. Is that…what you’re doing?” Tilting her head, her brow furrowed as she asked the question.

Zayne’s breath caught in his throat at her words, his eyes widening further the longer she spoke. His eyes were glued to hers, his pupils dilated due to the sunlight and the anxiety coursing through him. Not to mention her close proximity and the feeling of his perpetually cold hands held in her warm ones.

The woman’s words echoed in Zayne’s ears and the face of his mother flashed before his eyes �� the reason he hunted down the things that spawned from the denizens of his city. Because once upon a time, he had failed. Failed to protect the one person he loved. Each time he killed one of those things, someone’s mother, brother, sister, friend, or beloved… died. And yet, every time he killed one of those things, he knew he also saved someone else’s mother, brother, sister, friend, or beloved from the havoc it could wreak. Possibly more than one. Slowly, he nodded.

“…yes.” It was barely a whisper, but Zayne managed to force the word out. It was the only reason he still existed. The only reason he hadn’t given into despair. That, and the woman in front of him. But she didn’t need to know that. He dropped his gaze to where their hands met, noting the callouses on her fingers – reminiscent of the ones that usually adorned his hands. Both of their hands were similar due to their mutual pursuit of protection for those unable to defend themselves. He stayed quiet, unsure what else to say, tension creeping across him like frost.

Zayne had never been able to come to terms with the fact that in order to save lives, he also had to take them. Logically, he knew that it had to be done, that the things he killed were no longer human. But they had been. It haunted him, knowing that he was responsible for snuffing out so many lives. There never seemed to be enough water to scrub the blood from his hands, never enough light to cleanse the darkness he found himself in so often. Which is why nothing could have prepared him for the words that left her mouth next.

Smiling gently at his response, the woman intertwined her fingers with his, dipping her head slightly to try and catch his gaze again. “As long as you’re protecting people who can’t protect themselves, then… I’m proud of you.” Her eyes sparkled in the afternoon sunlight as she looked into his, trying to convey her sincerity. “From one Hunter to another.”

At her words, his head lifted, his gaze meeting hers again in pure astonishment. Proud? She was…proud? Zayne’s mind went blank, his mouth working to form words – any words. Words of protest, of dispute, of… anything other than silence. He shook his head, unable to process what she meant, when he heard her speak again.

“It’s not always easy, what we do. And a lot of times, we can’t save everyone. But knowing that the people we do save have a chance to live, to experience more, to love… Knowing that what we did provides them that chance… Isn’t that something to be proud of?” A fierce smile turned up the corners of her lips and lit her eyes, its warmth infectious as she leaned toward him.

The light in her expression and the cleansing logic of her words invaded Zayne’s mind, slowly calming the turmoil inside him. For so long, the idea – that what he did saved people – had simply been a justification of his actions, a way to keep from despising himself entirely. He had never looked at it as something to be proud of – not even once. One of his deepest fears had always been the idea that the woman he loved would despise him for the fact that he took lives, in comparison to the doctor, who only ever saved lives. If she ever even knew he existed.

The knowledge that not only did she not despise him for his actions – she was proud of him – hit Zayne like a ton of bricks. A strangled sound tore its way out of his throat, the noise making the woman tilt her head in surprise. As quickly as he could, Zayne looked away from her, clearing his throat in an attempt to disguise what he was almost certain had been a sob. Keeping his face turned from her, he tried to rein in his emotions, not wanting her to see how deeply her words had struck. He mentally added another item to the growing list of things he didn’t want her to witness. Crying.

Similar to the way her Evol had wrapped itself around him, curling about his heart and bringing light and warmth, her words of reassurance, of praise and acceptance, enveloped Zayne. They brought emotions to the surface that he had not experienced since he was a child, and he struggled to contain them, his eyes stinging with tears he fought to keep from falling. He shoved the long-forgotten feelings aside, pushing them back down, focusing on the feeling of her hands holding his, the sunlight warm on his face, and the sounds around them.

The woman waited patiently for him to respond, realizing that something was off with him, even if she wasn’t entirely sure of what. Her brow furrowed as she tilted her head, hoping that she hadn’t offended him somehow. The tension in his shoulders and the sound he had emitted made her want to wrap her arms around him, to comfort him. This was still Zayne after all, wasn’t it? Just as she was about to release his hands and move to embrace him, he responded.

Slowly, Zayne turned his face back toward her, the tightness in his throat subsiding through a Herculean effort of will. But when his gaze met hers, so open and caring, every feeling he had worked to shove away welled up again, his eyes blurring slightly. Unconsciously he leaned forward, his arms moving of their own accord as he wrapped them around her, burying his face into the crook of her neck, the rational part of his mind buried beneath the avalanche of his gratitude.

She was proud. She wasn’t condemning him. She didn’t hate him. She knew, at least in part, what he did, and not only was she not afraid of him, she was proud of him. The woman he loved was proud of him. Surely, this must be a dream. He would wake up at any second, and all of it would be gone.

Taken aback for a moment, the woman gasped softly in surprise. Then Zayne felt her arms come up around him, her hands splaying out across his broad back, her chin digging into his shoulder lightly as she returned his embrace. The warmth from her body spread through him, the softly floral scent of shampoo from her hair surrounded him, and as her arms tightened about him, Zayne knew it wasn’t a dream. She was real. This was real. A small shudder passed through him as he suppressed another sob, his chest and throat constricting as his eyes squeezed shut.

Somewhere in the back of his mind, Zayne knew that he needed to answer her question, that she likely expected a response of some kind. He had always considered what he did a necessity. Horrible, but the alternative was an even greater horror. Her words painted his actions in a new light, and though Zayne couldn’t quite bring himself to be proud of what he did, the simple fact that she was proud of him was more than enough.

 Drawing in a deep breath that filled his lungs with a scent that was uniquely her, Zayne opened his mouth to speak, then thought better of it, not trusting his voice. Instead, he nodded in response to her question, feeling her hair slide softly against his face as he did so.

Feeling him nod his head, she ran one of her hands up over his back gently, smiling at his agreement. She rested her cheek against his shoulder, relaxing in his arms for just a moment, trying to offer him as much comfort as she could. He seemed so… vulnerable. Of all the words she had ever used to describe Zayne, that had not been one of them. At least until now. Something about how he held onto her like she was both the only thing tethering him to reality and also the most precious thing he had ever touched, was incredibly charming. She had only intended the hug to last for a moment, but part of her didn’t want to pull away.

Zayne’s rational mind caught up with him as he felt her hands run along his back, the situation he was in asserting itself with startling clarity. Her arms were around him, her hands pressing against his back, the sensation both comforting and novel – the last time he had been hugged had been… When had that been?

Like lightning shooting through his veins, Zayne suddenly became very aware of the fact that her torso was pressed flush against him, her breath on his neck, her hair spilling across his cheek. For an instant, his hands pressed ever so gently into her back, feeling the soft skin beneath his fingertips due to the open back of her green sundress. His ears and cheeks grew warm, and he sucked in a breath, pulling away from her hastily and sitting back against the bench, his hands falling into his lap.

The woman’s eyebrows raised at how abruptly Zayne pulled away, but when she saw how red his ears were, she could only suppress a tiny smile. Deciding not to draw attention to his embarrassment, she stood quickly, brushing out the skirt of her dress with her hands. She glanced down the street, looking for Meow’s Café, and caught sight of it up ahead. “Zayne, look! There’s the place with the kitties.”

Zayne turned, glancing in the direction she was looking, spotting the sign decorated with small cats. His gaze returned almost immediately to the woman standing in front of him, the wind playing with her hair as she looked down the street, golden sunlight catching in the strands and illuminating her face. She looked like an angel. For just a moment, Zayne allowed himself to stare openly, his breath stolen by her loveliness. He fixed the image in his mind, of her standing there in front of him, bathed in golden light, a delighted smile playing across her features. Nothing would take that sight from him – it would remain with him until the day he died.

Turning back towards him, she smiled brightly, trying to lighten the mood. The look on his face made her pause for just a moment, the sunlight behind him framing his face in a warm glow, the auroras in his eyes positively glowing as Zayne looked back at her. Whatever she had been about to say faded, her cheeks flushing at the intensity of his gaze. She glanced down, her eyes flicking towards the ground and then back in the direction of the café, her heartbeat loud in her ears.

Knowing he had been caught staring, Zayne blinked when she glanced down, his hands fumbling with his coat and pulling it about him as he stood hurriedly. In doing so, he missed the blush that spread across her face, his gaze now directed down the street.

“My apologies… I didn’t mean to derail us from our destination,” said Zayne, his voice sounding only slightly strained. “The cats you mentioned might wonder why we’re late. Shall we?” Looking over at her, he offered her his arm, forcing a tentative smile to turn up the corners of his lips.

At the sound of Zayne’s voice, the woman composed herself as quickly as she could, looking back at him and noting his proffered arm. She took it with a smile, sliding her hand into the crook of his elbow, his playful comment and the sight of him with the plushies sticking out of his coat pockets making her laugh as she responded. “No worries. And you’re right, we certainly wouldn’t want to worry them.” As they moved down the street toward Meow’s Café, she couldn’t help but think how much she was enjoying herself, despite the strange circumstances.

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Requested (and Unrequested, lol) Tags: @callme-naomi @altair718 @seris-the-amious @schnittled @punk-cat

[hollowed-theory-hall]

Hiii! Do you think Harry stopped growing at 17? If he was as tall as James in DH I would imagine he was taller than his father. I have three brothers and my family is full of male cousins and they all had growth spurts after 17. I could see him growing another couple of inches after the war. His mind and body is finally at peace after 16 years. I always hc him to be 6’0-6’2 at the age of 21.

As far as Harry being scrawny… aren’t most teenage boys? My brothers were into sports and didn’t get into the gym until they were done with high school. With the profession he’s in I would assume fitness would be a requirement for the role. Yeah, you have a wand but what if it breaks or you lose it? He has a huge target on his back having defeated the darkest wizard of all time, and I can’t imagine him not learning how to physically defend himself and his loved ones. I don’t see him a huge buff gym junky, but I do see him as someone who has a lean athletic figure and someone who concentrates more on leg day than arm day. I think going to the gym would be an escape for him and help him decompress. I know the hp world prefer a shorter skinny hero (probably because of Daniel Radcliffe) who looks like an underdog, however every underdog grows up and barely anyone has the same physique as their teenage self.

Honestly, all this differs a lot with genetics. Harry's growth spurts in the books reminds me of my younger brother. Like, my brother was like 5'2 at 15, then, in like, one month near his 16th birthday, he grew to 5'10 and when he was around 19 he grew again by two inches. So, Harry could definitely still grow taller, but we don't really have a way to know.

Like, men can still grow in height until their late 20s, and it's possible James didn't even finish his growth since he died at 21, so he might've grown even taller if he survived to 25. Like, that's possible. I just don't really have evidence for or against besides saying, yes, it's possible, but I wouldn't call it likely since it's highly individual and based on genes. Like, I know guys who stopped growing at 16 and have been stuck at the same height since then. I also know guys who are 25 and still grow taller. It's the magic of genetics.

Muscle mass, physique, and the ability to gain weight are also heavily dependent on genetics and age. Men in their teens and early 20s usually have a much higher metabolic rate, which keeps them lean regardless of how much they eat (again, genetics play a big role here and this isn't true for everyone). Physical activity like Quidditch, would make the already fast metabolism faster. This naturally fast metabolism, combined with certain genetic makeup, can leave you looking lean regardless of how much you go to the gym as well. Some men need to reach their mid-20s before they can actually start gaining the weight necessary to appear buff.

I think Harry would look less lean as he got older. Like, I can hardly imagine a Harry in his mid to late 30s being as lean as 16-year-old Harry. I think his physique will change as he grows, as happens to most people. But I agree with you I don't see him as a super buff gym dude at any point in his life. He's always on the leaner side in my head, but this is all in headcanon territory since it isn't covered by the books.

I would like to add that all the super short and scrawny descriptions of Harry come from the first 4 books when these descriptions are correct. In book 6 Harry is thin, but no one describes him as a scrawny boy with knobbly knees past book 4. Not even he himself. So I definitely see Harry of the final 3 books as more lean than scrawny.

And yeah, you're right about Radcliffe messing up everyone's mental image of Harry, both in looks and personality. It's one of the things that bother me most about the movies. And, everyone can headcanon whatever they want, but I personally don't like short Harry (when he's older, when he's 14, make him short). It's not his canon character and when writers write him short, it's sometimes accompanied by him being written as too passive and meek for my liking because Harry James Potter is not passive or meek. (Radcliffe Harry in the movies is much more passive, hence the skewed mental image I mentioned, but I digress).

Besides, while malnourishment and food intake could affect one's growth, people tend to overlook the 6 years of Hogwarts and Molly's food which would be a huge boost during his puberty years in which he's having most of his growth. Additionally, some people's food intake matters less to their physical development than others — again, I can't stress enough how specific genetic makeup is super important in all this discussion.

TL;DR

Harry might grow taller to be 6' or 6'2. We don't have any evidence for or against really, so it's up to your preference on what you want to headcanon. But it's definitely super possible. If Lily was taller than the average it would even be likley (but I couldn't find any notes on Lily's or Petunia's height). In the books, he is very lean, and it's a combination of a lot of different factors working together: his lifestyle, genetic makeup, and yes, being a teenage boy with the fast metabolism that comes with it. As Harry grows up, he'd probably want to stay fit, but to what degree is also in personal headcanon territory (I personally don't like him becoming an Auror, but that's my preferred headcanon. I still see him staying pretty fit out of paranoia, sort of. I mean, he spent all his teenage years with a Damocles sword over his head. He literally died. I think he's allowed to be a little hypervigilant after that. I mean, he already is, but you get the point).

[eternalera]

im bored and wanna argue with a wall why i ship lawlight.

alright so lets get started! the first thing that people usually bring up with lawlight is the age gap. so basically at the start of the series light is 17 and L is 24 BUT when they meet light is 18 and L is still 24. theyre literally adults. now okay that's kinda a shit excuse so lets talk about why the age gap is NOT the problem with their toxicty. (its their personalities-)

first off the main problem with agegaps are the power imbalances, the thing with L and light is yeah they have this. but you wanna know what? they'd have this even if light was the exact same age as L, because the whole point of death note is the power struggle that the two of them have going on. why do they have this? because theyre equals in pretty much everything, IQ, tennis etc. the power struggle they have is intriguing and everyone can agree to this, you wanna know why? YOU WATCHED DEATH NOTE. thats like half of the entertainment, watching these two go toe to toe.

then there's the "theyre in different stages of life" argument. they're not, they're just really not. L's doing nothing with his life but solving cases (sry buddy but its true-), and light's literally just doing the same thing except killing people and keeping L from solving the case. not to mention that 6 years is not that big of an agegap. no, seriously im being so genuine right now. like yeah okay, its weird if an 18 yo dates a 12 yo thats wrong because the 18 yo is an adult with a TON of more life experiences than they 12 yo, they've gone through puberty, etc. they know a lot more about sex and stuff as well so that is grooming.

but what if a 30 and 36 yo are dating? that's fine, you wouldn't object to that as long as they met at a time when they were emotionally mature enough to make the decision to date.

also there are much larger age gaps than just 6 years in real life. there are tons of couples that have 10 or 12 years (one of my friends parents have a 20 year age gap) in between the two of them and have been together for a while (NOT when one of them was younger) and they're in a healthy relationship. my parents have a 6 year age gap, it's totally fine. theyre healthy there's not power imbalance and stuff like that

anyways moving on from that. there's the whole ethical standpoint of their debate but like... guys light's a mass murderer be so fr right now. then there's the victim x their abuser argument but literally that can go for either one of them.

yes light killed L but it wasnt like L wasn't trying to do the same (if he convicted light he WAS going to kill him, make no mistake on that). he literally told the task force how once he captured kira he was going to bring them his HEAD (he knew light was kira, he's known pretty much since he approached him at the college so he WANTED to kill light).

now is the ship toxic?... hell yeah, toxic as fuck. there are hardly any relationships (romantic or platonic) that arent toxic to some extent. hell even light and his father's relationship is toxic and they're family. light uses his father's position to kill more people, he wouldve killed his father if he was a risk into revealing that he was kira, he wouldve killed any of his family if them being alive was a risk to his identity.

but what about L? well he looks down on literally everyone who isn't as smart as him with the only exception being watari and possibly light. any relationship with him he's going to regard the person as wasting his time or not intelligent enough. there is that one line where misa kisses L on the cheek and he says how he could fall in love with her. i do think he's being genuine but keep in mind it would still be toxic for her as L is way more obsessed with figuring out tough cases than retaining a relationship.

so if its toxic people cant ship it right? wrong. there are tons of toxic relationships in fandom AND in canon that have insane power dynamics. there are a few in arcane as well, caitvi (caitlyn's an enforcer vi's from the undercity) and jayvik (viktor turned into a FUCKING GOD and tried to basically turn everyone into robots where jayce is literally JUST HUMAN) are pretty big examples. now are these toxic? Mmmm honestly depends on who you ask lol. imo yeah a little (in canon at least seeing as how caitlyn did gas vi's people and viktor DID try to take over piltover) but they're still shipped widely.

and even if a ship isn't inherently toxic some people will go out of there way to make it toxic because thats just what they like. its fandom. there are going to be stuff you do and dont like about it. lawlight just tends to be one of those things and honestly i dont think its as bad as people are making it out to be. and not to mention toxic ships really are just an acquired taste, once again its part of EVERY FANDOM (havent seen it yet, you will stick around, trust me it'll happen) and you just gotta learn to live with it lol.

now do i think that theyre in love in the anime? no, but do i ship them anyways and in my own aus? yeah, but then again either L's aged down or lights aged up so what the hell do i know?

hope you enjoyed my ranting lol. byeee

(ALSO THIS IS NOT BEING USED TO JUSTIFY FUCKED UP DYNAMICS IRL. THESE ARE FICTIONAL CHARACTERS.)

tldr: their age gap is NOT the problem to their toxicity its them and i like it that way